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• How to Write a Thesis Statement | 4 Steps & Examples

How to Write a Thesis Statement | 4 Steps & Examples

Published on January 11, 2019 by Shona McCombes . Revised on August 15, 2023 by Eoghan Ryan.

A thesis statement is a sentence that sums up the central point of your paper or essay . It usually comes near the end of your introduction .

Your thesis will look a bit different depending on the type of essay you’re writing. But the thesis statement should always clearly state the main idea you want to get across. Everything else in your essay should relate back to this idea.

You can write your thesis statement by following four simple steps:

• Start with a question
• Write your initial answer
• Develop your answer
• Refine your thesis statement

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Table of contents

What is a thesis statement, placement of the thesis statement, step 1: start with a question, step 2: write your initial answer, step 3: develop your answer, step 4: refine your thesis statement, types of thesis statements, other interesting articles, frequently asked questions about thesis statements.

A thesis statement summarizes the central points of your essay. It is a signpost telling the reader what the essay will argue and why.

The best thesis statements are:

• Concise: A good thesis statement is short and sweet—don’t use more words than necessary. State your point clearly and directly in one or two sentences.
• Contentious: Your thesis shouldn’t be a simple statement of fact that everyone already knows. A good thesis statement is a claim that requires further evidence or analysis to back it up.
• Coherent: Everything mentioned in your thesis statement must be supported and explained in the rest of your paper.

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The thesis statement generally appears at the end of your essay introduction or research paper introduction .

The spread of the internet has had a world-changing effect, not least on the world of education. The use of the internet in academic contexts and among young people more generally is hotly debated. For many who did not grow up with this technology, its effects seem alarming and potentially harmful. This concern, while understandable, is misguided. The negatives of internet use are outweighed by its many benefits for education: the internet facilitates easier access to information, exposure to different perspectives, and a flexible learning environment for both students and teachers.

You should come up with an initial thesis, sometimes called a working thesis , early in the writing process . As soon as you’ve decided on your essay topic , you need to work out what you want to say about it—a clear thesis will give your essay direction and structure.

You might already have a question in your assignment, but if not, try to come up with your own. What would you like to find out or decide about your topic?

For example, you might ask:

After some initial research, you can formulate a tentative answer to this question. At this stage it can be simple, and it should guide the research process and writing process .

Now you need to consider why this is your answer and how you will convince your reader to agree with you. As you read more about your topic and begin writing, your answer should get more detailed.

In your essay about the internet and education, the thesis states your position and sketches out the key arguments you’ll use to support it.

The negatives of internet use are outweighed by its many benefits for education because it facilitates easier access to information.

In your essay about braille, the thesis statement summarizes the key historical development that you’ll explain.

The invention of braille in the 19th century transformed the lives of blind people, allowing them to participate more actively in public life.

A strong thesis statement should tell the reader:

• Why you hold this position
• What they’ll learn from your essay
• The key points of your argument or narrative

The final thesis statement doesn’t just state your position, but summarizes your overall argument or the entire topic you’re going to explain. To strengthen a weak thesis statement, it can help to consider the broader context of your topic.

These examples are more specific and show that you’ll explore your topic in depth.

Your thesis statement should match the goals of your essay, which vary depending on the type of essay you’re writing:

• In an argumentative essay , your thesis statement should take a strong position. Your aim in the essay is to convince your reader of this thesis based on evidence and logical reasoning.
• In an expository essay , you’ll aim to explain the facts of a topic or process. Your thesis statement doesn’t have to include a strong opinion in this case, but it should clearly state the central point you want to make, and mention the key elements you’ll explain.

If you want to know more about AI tools , college essays , or fallacies make sure to check out some of our other articles with explanations and examples or go directly to our tools!

• Ad hominem fallacy
• Post hoc fallacy
• Appeal to authority fallacy
• False cause fallacy
• Sunk cost fallacy

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A thesis statement is a sentence that sums up the central point of your paper or essay . Everything else you write should relate to this key idea.

The thesis statement is essential in any academic essay or research paper for two main reasons:

• It gives your writing direction and focus.
• It gives the reader a concise summary of your main point.

Without a clear thesis statement, an essay can end up rambling and unfocused, leaving your reader unsure of exactly what you want to say.

Follow these four steps to come up with a thesis statement :

• Ask a question about your topic .
• Write your initial answer.
• Develop your answer by including reasons.
• Refine your answer, adding more detail and nuance.

The thesis statement should be placed at the end of your essay introduction .

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• The Writing Process
• Addressing the Prompt
• Writing Skill: Development
• Originality
• Timed Writing (Expectations)
• Integrated Writing (Writing Process)
• Introduction to Academic Essays
• Organization
• Introduction Paragraphs

Body Paragraphs

• Conclusion Paragraphs
• Example Essay 1
• Example Essay 2
• Timed Writing (The Prompt)
• Integrated Writing (TOEFL Task 1)
• Process Essays
• Process Essay Example 1
• Process Essay Example 2
• Writing Skill: Unity
• Revise A Process Essay
• Timed Writing (Choose a Position)
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• Comparison Essay Example 1
• Comparison Essay Example 2
• Writing Skill: Cohesion
• Revise A Comparison Essay
• Timed Writing (Plans & Problems)
• Integrated Writing (Word Choice)
• Problem/Solution Essays
• Problem/Solution Essay Example 1
• Problem/Solution Example Essay 2
• Writing Skill: Summary
• Revise A Problem/Solution Essay
• Timed Writing (Revising)
• Integrated Writing (Summary)
• More Writing Skills
• Punctuation
• Simple Sentences
• Compound Sentences
• Complex Sentences Part 1
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Body paragraphs should all work to support your thesis by explaining why or how your thesis is true. There are three types of sentences in each body paragraph: topic sentences, supporting sentences, and concluding sentences.

Topic sentences

A topic sentence states the focus of the paragraph. The rest of the body paragraph will give evidence and explanations that show why or how your topic sentence is true. A topic sentence is very similar to a thesis. The thesis is the main idea of the essay; a topic sentence is the main idea of a body paragraph. Many of the same characteristics apply to topic sentences that apply to theses. The biggest differences will be the location of the sentence and the scope of the ideas.

An effective topic sentence—

• clearly supports the thesis statement.
• is usually at the beginning of a body paragraph.
• controls the content of all of the supporting sentences in its paragraph.
• is a complete sentence.
• does not announce the topic (e.g., “I’m going to talk about exercise.”).
• should not be t oo general (e.g., “Exercise is good.”).
• should not be too specific (e.g., “Exercise decreases the chance of developing diabetes, heart disease, asthma, osteoporosis, depression, and anxiety.”).

Supporting sentences

Your body paragraph needs to explain why or how your topic sentence is true. The sentences that support your topic sentence are called supporting sentences. You can have many types of supporting sentences. Supporting sentences can give examples, explanations, details, descriptions, facts, reasons, etc.

Concluding sentences

Your final statement should conclude your paragraph logically. Concluding sentences can restate the main idea of your paragraph, state an opinion, make a prediction, give advice, etc. New ideas should not be presented in your concluding sentence.

 Exercise 1: Analyze a topic sentence.

Read the example body paragraph below to complete this exercise on a piece of paper.

Prompt: Why is exercise important?

Thesis: Exercise is essential because it improves overall physical and mental health.

            Because it makes your body healthier, exercise is extremely important. One of the physical benefits of exercise is having stronger muscles. The only way to make your muscles stronger is to use them, and exercises like crunches, squats, lunges, push-ups, and weight-lifting are good examples of exercises that strengthen your muscles. Another benefit of exercise is that it lowers your heart rate. A slow heart rate can show that our hearts are working more efficiently and they don’t have to pump as many times in a minute to get blood to our organs. Related to our heart beating more efficiently, our blood pressure decreases. These are just some of the incredible health benefits of exercise.

Find the topic sentence. Use the following criteria to evaluate the topic sentence.

• Does the topic sentence clearly support the thesis statement?
• Is the topic sentence at the beginning of the body paragraph?
• Does the topic sentence control the content of all the supporting sentences?
• Is the topic sentence a complete sentence?
• Does the topic sentence announce the topic?
• Is the topic sentence too general? Is it too specific?

Exercise 2: Identify topic sentences.

Each group of sentences has three supporting sentences and one topic sentence. The topic sentence must be broad enough to include all of the supporting sentences. In each group of sentences, choose which sentence is the topic sentence. Write the letter of the topic sentence on the line given.  

Group 1: Topic sentence: _________ 

• In southern Utah, hikers enjoy the scenic trails in Zion National Park.  
• Many cities in Utah have created hiking trails in city parks for people to use.  
• There are hiking paths in Utah’s Rocky Mountains that provide beautiful views.  
• Hikers all over Utah can access hiking trails and enjoy nature.  

Group 2: Topic sentence: _________ 

• People in New York speak many different languages.  
• New York is a culturally diverse city.  
• People in New York belong to many different religions.  
• Restaurants in New York have food from all over the world.  

Group 3: Topic sentence: _________ 

• Websites like YouTube have video tutorials that teach many different skills.  
• Computer programs like PowerPoint are used in classrooms to teach new concepts.  
• Technology helps people learn things in today’s world.  
• Many educational apps have been created to help children in school.  

Group 4: Topic sentence: _________ 

• Museums at BYU host events on the weekends for students.  
• There are many fun activities for students at BYU on the weekends.  
• There are incredible student concerts at BYU on Friday and Saturday nights.  
• BYU clubs plan exciting activities for students to do on the weekends.  

Group 5: Topic sentence: _________

• Some places have a scent that people remember when they think of that place.  
• The smell of someone’s cologne can trigger a memory of that person.  
• Smelling certain foods can bring back memories of eating that food.  
• Many different memories can be connected to specific smells.  

Exercise 3: Write topic sentences

Read each paragraph. On a piece of paper, write a topic sentence on the line at the beginning of the paragraph.

1._______ The first difference is that you have more privacy in a private room than in a shared room. You can go to your room to have a private phone call or Skype with your family and you are not bothered by other people. When you share your room, it can be hard to find private time when you can do things alone. Another difference is that it is lonelier in a private room than in a shared room. When you share your room with a roommate, you have someone that you can talk to. Frequently when you have a private room, you are alone more often. These two housing options are very different.

2. _______ People like to eat chocolate because it has many delicious flavors. For example, there are mint chocolates, milk chocolates, dark chocolates, white chocolates, chocolates with honey, and chocolates with nuts. Another reason people like to eat chocolate is because it reduces stress, which can help people to relax and feel better. The last reason people like to eat chocolate is because it can be cooked in many different ways. You can eat chocolate candies, mix chocolate with warm milk to drink, or prepare a chocolate dessert. These reasons are some of the reasons that people like to eat chocolate.

3. _______ A respectful roommate does not leave the main areas of the apartment messy after they use them. For example, they wash their dishes instead of leaving dirty pots and pans on the stove. They also don’t borrow things from other roommates without asking to use them first. In addition to respecting everyone’s need for space and their possessions, the ideal roommate is respectful of his or her roommate’s schedule. For example, if one roommate is asleep and the other roommates needs to study, the ideal roommate goes to the kitchen or living room instead of waking up the sleeping roommate. These simple gestures of respect make a roommate an excellent person to share an apartment with.

Exercise 4: Identify good supporting sentences.

Read the topic sentence. Then circle which sentences would be good supporting sentences.  

Topic Sentence: Eating pancakes for breakfast saves time and money.  

• Pancakes can be prepared in large quantities and then frozen, so the time it takes to   cook breakfast is only a few minutes.  
• Pancakes are very inexpensive to make because you only need a few ingredients.  
• Pancakes are delicious and can be prepared in a variety of flavors.  
• Pancakes save money because you can buy a big box of mix and only make what you   need; you don’t waste money because you can save the extra mix for another time.  
• Fresh fruit is a really quick breakfast because you only need to wash it and eat it.

Exercise 5: Identify good concluding sentences.

Read the topic sentence. Then circle which sentences would be good concluding sentences.  

Topic Sentence: A shared room offers students a more social experience.  

• Students who want more social interaction should have a shared room.  
• A shared room is not good for students who work late.  
• Everyone loves having a shared room.  
• These examples illustrate how much more social a shared room can be.  
• Really social students will enjoy having a shared room.

Exercise 6: Write concluding sentences.

On a piece of paper, write a concluding sentence at the end of each paragraph.

1. New York is a culturally diverse city. This culture is continually broadened because people immigrate from all over the world bringing different religions, food, and languages with them. This city has people that speak over 30 languages, including Arabic, Mandarin, Untu, Russian, and Polish. There are also more than 20 major religions represented by citizens of New York. These citizens brought more than their language and religion with them, however. They also brought traditional foods from their countries. _______

2. Technology helps people learn things in today’s world. This educational technology includes various websites, apps, programs, and many more things. Popular websites that are used for education include YouTube, TED, Canvas, and CrashCourse. Similarly, there are a variety of educational apps. These apps help users learn languages, history, math, and other practical skills. Computer programs are yet another way to use technology as a way to help people learn. Programs like PowerPoint are frequently used in classrooms as a means to deliver visual support to a lecture or presentation. This visual support aids learning and retention. _______

This content is provided to you freely by BYU Open Learning Network.

Access it online or download it at https://open.byu.edu/academic_a_writing/body_paragraphs .

10 min read

How to write strong essay body paragraphs (with examples)

In this blog post, we'll discuss how to write clear, convincing essay body paragraphs using many examples. We'll also be writing paragraphs together. By the end, you'll have a good understanding of how to write a strong essay body for any topic.

Table of Contents

Introduction, how to structure a body paragraph, creating an outline for our essay body, 1. a strong thesis statment takes a stand, 2. a strong thesis statement allows for debate, 3. a strong thesis statement is specific, writing the first essay body paragraph, how not to write a body paragraph, writing the second essay body paragraph.

After writing a great introduction to our essay, let's make our case in the body paragraphs. These are where we will present our arguments, back them up with evidence, and, in most cases, refute counterarguments. Introductions are very similar across the various types of essays. For example, an argumentative essay's introduction will be near identical to an introduction written for an expository essay. In contrast, the body paragraphs are structured differently depending on the type of essay.

In an expository essay, we are investigating an idea or analyzing the circumstances of a case. In contrast, we want to make compelling points with an argumentative essay to convince readers to agree with us.

The most straightforward technique to make an argument is to provide context first, then make a general point, and lastly back that point up in the following sentences. Not starting with your idea directly but giving context first is crucial in constructing a clear and easy-to-follow paragraph.

How to ideally structure a body paragraph:

• Provide context
• Make your thesis statement
• Support that argument

Now that we have the ideal structure for an argumentative essay, the best step to proceed is to outline the subsequent paragraphs. For the outline, we'll be writing one sentence that is simple in wording and describes the argument that we'll make in that paragraph concisely. Why are we doing that? An outline does more than give you a structure to work off of in the following essay body, thereby saving you time. It also helps you not to repeat yourself or, even worse, to accidentally contradict yourself later on.

While working on the outline, remember that revising your initial topic sentences is completely normal. They do not need to be flawless. Starting the outline with those thoughts can help accelerate writing the entire essay and can be very beneficial in avoiding writer's block.

For the essay body, we'll be proceeding with the topic we've written an introduction for in the previous article - the dangers of social media on society.

These are the main points I would like to make in the essay body regarding the dangers of social media:

Amplification of one's existing beliefs

Skewed comparisons

What makes a polished thesis statement?

Now that we've got our main points, let's create our outline for the body by writing one clear and straightforward topic sentence (which is the same as a thesis statement) for each idea. How do we write a great topic sentence? First, take a look at the three characteristics of a strong thesis statement.

Consider this thesis statement:

'While social media can have some negative effects, it can also be used positively.'

What stand does it take? Which negative and positive aspects does the author mean? While this one:

'Because social media is linked to a rise in mental health problems, it poses a danger to users.'

takes a clear stand and is very precise about the object of discussion.

If your thesis statement is not arguable, then your paper will not likely be enjoyable to read. Consider this thesis statement:

'Lots of people around the globe use social media.'

It does not allow for much discussion at all. Even if you were to argue that more or fewer people are using it on this planet, that wouldn't make for a very compelling argument.

'Although social media has numerous benefits, its various risks, including cyberbullying and possible addiction, mostly outweigh its benefits.'

Whether or not you consider this statement true, it allows for much more discussion than the previous one. It provides a basis for an engaging, thought-provoking paper by taking a position that you can discuss.

A thesis statement is one sentence that clearly states what you will discuss in that paragraph. It should give an overview of the main points you will discuss and show how these relate to your topic. For example, if you were to examine the rapid growth of social media, consider this thesis statement:

'There are many reasons for the rise in social media usage.'

That thesis statement is weak for two reasons. First, depending on the length of your essay, you might need to narrow your focus because the "rise in social media usage" can be a large and broad topic you cannot address adequately in a few pages. Secondly, the term "many reasons" is vague and does not give the reader an idea of what you will discuss in your paper.

In contrast, consider this thesis statement:

'The rise in social media usage is due to the increasing popularity of platforms like Facebook and Twitter, allowing users to connect with friends and share information effortlessly.'

Why is this better? Not only does it abide by the first two rules by allowing for debate and taking a stand, but this statement also narrows the subject down and identifies significant reasons for the increasing popularity of social media.

In conclusion : A strong thesis statement takes a clear stand, allows for discussion, and is specific.

Let's make use of how to write a good thopic sentence and put it into practise for our two main points from before. This is what good topic sentences could look like:

Echo chambers facilitated by social media promote political segregation in society.

Applied to the second argument:

Viewing other people's lives online through a distorted lens can lead to feelings of envy and inadequacy, as well as unrealistic expectations about one's life.

These topic sentences will be a very convenient structure for the whole body of our essay. Let's build out the first body paragraph, then closely examine how we did it so you can apply it to your essay.

Example: First body paragraph

If social media users mostly see content that reaffirms their existing beliefs, it can create an "echo chamber" effect. The echo chamber effect describes the user's limited exposure to diverse perspectives, making it challenging to examine those beliefs critically, thereby contributing to society's political polarization. This polarization emerges from social media becoming increasingly based on algorithms, which cater content to users based on their past interactions on the site. Further contributing to this shared narrative is the very nature of social media, allowing politically like-minded individuals to connect (Sunstein, 2018). Consequently, exposure to only one side of the argument can make it very difficult to see the other side's perspective, marginalizing opposing viewpoints. The entrenchment of one's beliefs by constant reaffirmation and amplification of political ideas results in segregation along partisan lines.

Sunstein, C. R (2018). #Republic: Divided Democracy in the Age of Social Media. Princeton: Princeton University Press.

In the first sentence, we provide context for the argument that we are about to make. Then, in the second sentence, we clearly state the topic we are addressing (social media contributing to political polarization).

Our topic sentence tells readers that a detailed discussion of the echo chamber effect and its consequences is coming next. All the following sentences, which make up most of the paragraph, either a) explain or b) support this point.

Finally, we answer the questions about how social media facilitates the echo chamber effect and the consequences. Try implementing the same structure in your essay body paragraph to allow for a logical and cohesive argument.

These paragraphs should be focused, so don't incorporate multiple arguments into one. Squeezing ideas into a single paragraph makes it challenging for readers to follow your reasoning. Instead, reserve each body paragraph for a single statement to be discussed and only switch to the next section once you feel that you thoroughly explained and supported your topic sentence.

Let's look at an example that might seem appropriate initially but should be modified.

Negative example: Try identifying the main argument

Over the past decade, social media platforms have become increasingly popular methods of communication and networking. However, these platforms' algorithmic nature fosters echo chambers or online spaces where users only encounter information that reinforces their existing beliefs. This echo chamber effect can lead to a lack of understanding or empathy for those with different perspectives and can even amplify the effects of confirmation bias. The same principle of one-sided exposure to opinions can be abstracted and applied to the biased subjection to lifestyles we see on social media. The constant exposure to these highly-curated and often unrealistic portrayals of other people's lives can lead us to believe that our own lives are inadequate in comparison. These feelings of inadequacy can be especially harmful to young people, who are still developing their sense of self.

Let's analyze this essay paragraph. Introducing the topic sentence by stating the social functions of social media is very useful because it provides context for the following argument. Naming those functions in the first sentence also allows for a smooth transition by contrasting the initial sentence ("However, ...") with the topic sentence. Also, the topic sentence abides by our three rules for creating a strong thesis statement:

• Taking a clear stand: algorithms are substantial contributors to the echo chamber effect
• Allowing for debate: there is literature rejecting this claim
• Being specific: analyzing a specific cause of the effect (algorithms).

So, where's the problem with this body paragraph?

It begins with what seems like a single argument (social media algorithms contributing to the echo chamber effect). Yet after addressing the consequences of the echo-chamber effect right after the thesis sentence, the author applies the same principle to a whole different topic. At the end of the paragraph, the reader is probably feeling confused. What was the paragraph trying to achieve in the first place?

We should place the second idea of being exposed to curated lifestyles in a separate section instead of shoehorning it into the end of the first one. All sentences following the thesis statement should either explain it or provide evidence (refuting counterarguments falls into this category, too).

With our first body paragraph done and having seen an example of what to avoid, let's take the topic of being exposed to curated lifestyles through social media and construct a separate body paragraph for it. We have already provided sufficient context for the reader to follow our argument, so it is unnecessary for this particular paragraph.

Body paragraph 2

Another cause for social media's destructiveness is the users' inclination to only share the highlights of their lives on social media, consequently distorting our perceptions of reality. A highly filtered view of their life leads to feelings of envy and inadequacy, as well as a distorted understanding of what is considered ordinary (Liu et al., 2018). In addition, frequent social media use is linked to decreased self-esteem and body satisfaction (Perloff, 2014). One way social media can provide a curated view of people's lives is through filters, making photos look more radiant, shadier, more or less saturated, and similar. Further, editing tools allow people to fundamentally change how their photos and videos look before sharing them, allowing for inserting or removing certain parts of the image. Editing tools give people considerable control over how their photos and videos look before sharing them, thereby facilitating the curation of one's online persona.

Perloff, R.M. Social Media Effects on Young Women's Body Image Concerns: Theoretical Perspectives and an Agenda for Research. Sex Roles 71, 363–377 (2014).

Liu, Hongbo & Wu, Laurie & Li, Xiang. (2018). Social Media Envy: How Experience Sharing on Social Networking Sites Drives Millennials' Aspirational Tourism Consumption. Journal of Travel Research. 58. 10.1177/0047287518761615.

Dr. Jacob Neumann put it this way in his book A professors guide to writing essays: 'If you've written strong and clear topic sentences, you're well on your way to creating focused paragraphs.'

They provide the basis for each paragraph's development and content, allowing you not to get caught up in the details and lose sight of the overall objective. It's crucial not to neglect that step. Apply these principles to your essay body, whatever the topic, and you'll set yourself up for the best possible results.

Sources used for creating this article

• Writing a solid thesis statement : https://www.vwu.edu/academics/academic-support/learning-center/pdfs/Thesis-Statement.pdf
• Neumann, Jacob. A professor's guide to writing essays. 2016.

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9.1 Developing a Strong, Clear Thesis Statement

Learning objectives.

• Develop a strong, clear thesis statement with the proper elements.
• Revise your thesis statement.

Have you ever known a person who was not very good at telling stories? You probably had trouble following his train of thought as he jumped around from point to point, either being too brief in places that needed further explanation or providing too many details on a meaningless element. Maybe he told the end of the story first, then moved to the beginning and later added details to the middle. His ideas were probably scattered, and the story did not flow very well. When the story was over, you probably had many questions.

Just as a personal anecdote can be a disorganized mess, an essay can fall into the same trap of being out of order and confusing. That is why writers need a thesis statement to provide a specific focus for their essay and to organize what they are about to discuss in the body.

Just like a topic sentence summarizes a single paragraph, the thesis statement summarizes an entire essay. It tells the reader the point you want to make in your essay, while the essay itself supports that point. It is like a signpost that signals the essay’s destination. You should form your thesis before you begin to organize an essay, but you may find that it needs revision as the essay develops.

Elements of a Thesis Statement

For every essay you write, you must focus on a central idea. This idea stems from a topic you have chosen or been assigned or from a question your teacher has asked. It is not enough merely to discuss a general topic or simply answer a question with a yes or no. You have to form a specific opinion, and then articulate that into a controlling idea —the main idea upon which you build your thesis.

Remember that a thesis is not the topic itself, but rather your interpretation of the question or subject. For whatever topic your professor gives you, you must ask yourself, “What do I want to say about it?” Asking and then answering this question is vital to forming a thesis that is precise, forceful and confident.

A thesis is one sentence long and appears toward the end of your introduction. It is specific and focuses on one to three points of a single idea—points that are able to be demonstrated in the body. It forecasts the content of the essay and suggests how you will organize your information. Remember that a thesis statement does not summarize an issue but rather dissects it.

A Strong Thesis Statement

A strong thesis statement contains the following qualities.

Specificity. A thesis statement must concentrate on a specific area of a general topic. As you may recall, the creation of a thesis statement begins when you choose a broad subject and then narrow down its parts until you pinpoint a specific aspect of that topic. For example, health care is a broad topic, but a proper thesis statement would focus on a specific area of that topic, such as options for individuals without health care coverage.

Precision. A strong thesis statement must be precise enough to allow for a coherent argument and to remain focused on the topic. If the specific topic is options for individuals without health care coverage, then your precise thesis statement must make an exact claim about it, such as that limited options exist for those who are uninsured by their employers. You must further pinpoint what you are going to discuss regarding these limited effects, such as whom they affect and what the cause is.

Ability to be argued. A thesis statement must present a relevant and specific argument. A factual statement often is not considered arguable. Be sure your thesis statement contains a point of view that can be supported with evidence.

Ability to be demonstrated. For any claim you make in your thesis, you must be able to provide reasons and examples for your opinion. You can rely on personal observations in order to do this, or you can consult outside sources to demonstrate that what you assert is valid. A worthy argument is backed by examples and details.

Forcefulness. A thesis statement that is forceful shows readers that you are, in fact, making an argument. The tone is assertive and takes a stance that others might oppose.

Confidence. In addition to using force in your thesis statement, you must also use confidence in your claim. Phrases such as I feel or I believe actually weaken the readers’ sense of your confidence because these phrases imply that you are the only person who feels the way you do. In other words, your stance has insufficient backing. Taking an authoritative stance on the matter persuades your readers to have faith in your argument and open their minds to what you have to say.

Even in a personal essay that allows the use of first person, your thesis should not contain phrases such as in my opinion or I believe . These statements reduce your credibility and weaken your argument. Your opinion is more convincing when you use a firm attitude.

On a separate sheet of paper, write a thesis statement for each of the following topics. Remember to make each statement specific, precise, demonstrable, forceful and confident.

• Texting while driving
• The legal drinking age in the United States
• Steroid use among professional athletes

Examples of Appropriate Thesis Statements

Each of the following thesis statements meets several of the following requirements:

• Specificity
• Ability to be argued
• Ability to be demonstrated
• Forcefulness
• The societal and personal struggles of Troy Maxon in the play Fences symbolize the challenge of black males who lived through segregation and integration in the United States.
• Closing all American borders for a period of five years is one solution that will tackle illegal immigration.
• Shakespeare’s use of dramatic irony in Romeo and Juliet spoils the outcome for the audience and weakens the plot.
• J. D. Salinger’s character in Catcher in the Rye , Holden Caulfield, is a confused rebel who voices his disgust with phonies, yet in an effort to protect himself, he acts like a phony on many occasions.
• Compared to an absolute divorce, no-fault divorce is less expensive, promotes fairer settlements, and reflects a more realistic view of the causes for marital breakdown.
• Exposing children from an early age to the dangers of drug abuse is a sure method of preventing future drug addicts.
• In today’s crumbling job market, a high school diploma is not significant enough education to land a stable, lucrative job.

You can find thesis statements in many places, such as in the news; in the opinions of friends, coworkers or teachers; and even in songs you hear on the radio. Become aware of thesis statements in everyday life by paying attention to people’s opinions and their reasons for those opinions. Pay attention to your own everyday thesis statements as well, as these can become material for future essays.

Now that you have read about the contents of a good thesis statement and have seen examples, take a look at the pitfalls to avoid when composing your own thesis:

A thesis is weak when it is simply a declaration of your subject or a description of what you will discuss in your essay.

Weak thesis statement: My paper will explain why imagination is more important than knowledge.

A thesis is weak when it makes an unreasonable or outrageous claim or insults the opposing side.

Weak thesis statement: Religious radicals across America are trying to legislate their Puritanical beliefs by banning required high school books.

A thesis is weak when it contains an obvious fact or something that no one can disagree with or provides a dead end.

Weak thesis statement: Advertising companies use sex to sell their products.

A thesis is weak when the statement is too broad.

Weak thesis statement: The life of Abraham Lincoln was long and challenging.

Read the following thesis statements. On a separate piece of paper, identify each as weak or strong. For those that are weak, list the reasons why. Then revise the weak statements so that they conform to the requirements of a strong thesis.

• The subject of this paper is my experience with ferrets as pets.
• The government must expand its funding for research on renewable energy resources in order to prepare for the impending end of oil.
• Edgar Allan Poe was a poet who lived in Baltimore during the nineteenth century.
• In this essay, I will give you lots of reasons why slot machines should not be legalized in Baltimore.
• Despite his promises during his campaign, President Kennedy took few executive measures to support civil rights legislation.
• Because many children’s toys have potential safety hazards that could lead to injury, it is clear that not all children’s toys are safe.
• My experience with young children has taught me that I want to be a disciplinary parent because I believe that a child without discipline can be a parent’s worst nightmare.

Writing at Work

Often in your career, you will need to ask your boss for something through an e-mail. Just as a thesis statement organizes an essay, it can also organize your e-mail request. While your e-mail will be shorter than an essay, using a thesis statement in your first paragraph quickly lets your boss know what you are asking for, why it is necessary, and what the benefits are. In short body paragraphs, you can provide the essential information needed to expand upon your request.

Thesis Statement Revision

Your thesis will probably change as you write, so you will need to modify it to reflect exactly what you have discussed in your essay. Remember from Chapter 8 “The Writing Process: How Do I Begin?” that your thesis statement begins as a working thesis statement , an indefinite statement that you make about your topic early in the writing process for the purpose of planning and guiding your writing.

Working thesis statements often become stronger as you gather information and form new opinions and reasons for those opinions. Revision helps you strengthen your thesis so that it matches what you have expressed in the body of the paper.

The best way to revise your thesis statement is to ask questions about it and then examine the answers to those questions. By challenging your own ideas and forming definite reasons for those ideas, you grow closer to a more precise point of view, which you can then incorporate into your thesis statement.

Ways to Revise Your Thesis

You can cut down on irrelevant aspects and revise your thesis by taking the following steps:

1. Pinpoint and replace all nonspecific words, such as people , everything , society , or life , with more precise words in order to reduce any vagueness.

Working thesis: Young people have to work hard to succeed in life.

Revised thesis: Recent college graduates must have discipline and persistence in order to find and maintain a stable job in which they can use and be appreciated for their talents.

The revised thesis makes a more specific statement about success and what it means to work hard. The original includes too broad a range of people and does not define exactly what success entails. By replacing those general words like people and work hard , the writer can better focus his or her research and gain more direction in his or her writing.

2. Clarify ideas that need explanation by asking yourself questions that narrow your thesis.

Working thesis: The welfare system is a joke.

Revised thesis: The welfare system keeps a socioeconomic class from gaining employment by alluring members of that class with unearned income, instead of programs to improve their education and skill sets.

A joke means many things to many people. Readers bring all sorts of backgrounds and perspectives to the reading process and would need clarification for a word so vague. This expression may also be too informal for the selected audience. By asking questions, the writer can devise a more precise and appropriate explanation for joke . The writer should ask himself or herself questions similar to the 5WH questions. (See Chapter 8 “The Writing Process: How Do I Begin?” for more information on the 5WH questions.) By incorporating the answers to these questions into a thesis statement, the writer more accurately defines his or her stance, which will better guide the writing of the essay.

3. Replace any linking verbs with action verbs. Linking verbs are forms of the verb to be , a verb that simply states that a situation exists.

Working thesis: Kansas City schoolteachers are not paid enough.

Revised thesis: The Kansas City legislature cannot afford to pay its educators, resulting in job cuts and resignations in a district that sorely needs highly qualified and dedicated teachers.

The linking verb in this working thesis statement is the word are . Linking verbs often make thesis statements weak because they do not express action. Rather, they connect words and phrases to the second half of the sentence. Readers might wonder, “Why are they not paid enough?” But this statement does not compel them to ask many more questions. The writer should ask himself or herself questions in order to replace the linking verb with an action verb, thus forming a stronger thesis statement, one that takes a more definitive stance on the issue:

• Who is not paying the teachers enough?
• What is considered “enough”?
• What is the problem?
• What are the results

4. Omit any general claims that are hard to support.

Working thesis: Today’s teenage girls are too sexualized.

Revised thesis: Teenage girls who are captivated by the sexual images on MTV are conditioned to believe that a woman’s worth depends on her sensuality, a feeling that harms their self-esteem and behavior.

It is true that some young women in today’s society are more sexualized than in the past, but that is not true for all girls. Many girls have strict parents, dress appropriately, and do not engage in sexual activity while in middle school and high school. The writer of this thesis should ask the following questions:

• Which teenage girls?
• What constitutes “too” sexualized?
• Why are they behaving that way?
• Where does this behavior show up?
• What are the repercussions?

In the first section of Chapter 8 “The Writing Process: How Do I Begin?” , you determined your purpose for writing and your audience. You then completed a freewriting exercise about an event you recently experienced and chose a general topic to write about. Using that general topic, you then narrowed it down by answering the 5WH questions. After you answered these questions, you chose one of the three methods of prewriting and gathered possible supporting points for your working thesis statement.

Now, on a separate sheet of paper, write down your working thesis statement. Identify any weaknesses in this sentence and revise the statement to reflect the elements of a strong thesis statement. Make sure it is specific, precise, arguable, demonstrable, forceful, and confident.

Collaboration

Please share with a classmate and compare your answers.

In your career you may have to write a project proposal that focuses on a particular problem in your company, such as reinforcing the tardiness policy. The proposal would aim to fix the problem; using a thesis statement would clearly state the boundaries of the problem and tell the goals of the project. After writing the proposal, you may find that the thesis needs revision to reflect exactly what is expressed in the body. Using the techniques from this chapter would apply to revising that thesis.

Key Takeaways

• Proper essays require a thesis statement to provide a specific focus and suggest how the essay will be organized.
• A thesis statement is your interpretation of the subject, not the topic itself.
• A strong thesis is specific, precise, forceful, confident, and is able to be demonstrated.
• A strong thesis challenges readers with a point of view that can be debated and can be supported with evidence.
• A weak thesis is simply a declaration of your topic or contains an obvious fact that cannot be argued.
• Depending on your topic, it may or may not be appropriate to use first person point of view.
• Revise your thesis by ensuring all words are specific, all ideas are exact, and all verbs express action.

Writing for Success Copyright © 2015 by University of Minnesota is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License , except where otherwise noted.

TOPIC SENTENCE/ In his numerous writings, Marx critiques capitalism by identifying its flaws. ANALYSIS OF EVIDENCE/ By critiquing the political economy and capitalism, Marx implores his reader to think critically about their position in society and restores awareness in the proletariat class. EVIDENCE/ To Marx, capitalism is a system characterized by the “exploitation of the many by the few,” in which workers accept the exploitation of their labor and receive only harm of “alienation,” rather than true benefits ( MER 487). He writes that “labour produces for the rich wonderful things – but for the worker it produces privation. It produces palaces—but for the worker, hovels. It produces beauty—but for the worker, deformity” (MER 73). Marx argues capitalism is a system in which the laborer is repeatedly harmed and estranged from himself, his labor, and other people, while the owner of his labor – the capitalist – receives the benefits ( MER 74). And while industry progresses, the worker “sinks deeper and deeper below the conditions of existence of his own class” ( MER 483).  ANALYSIS OF EVIDENCE/ But while Marx critiques the political economy, he does not explicitly say “capitalism is wrong.” Rather, his close examination of the system makes its flaws obvious. Only once the working class realizes the flaws of the system, Marx believes, will they - must they - rise up against their bourgeois masters and achieve the necessary and inevitable communist revolution.

Not every paragraph will be structured exactly like this one, of course. But as you draft your own paragraphs, look for all three of these elements: topic sentence, evidence, and analysis.

• picture_as_pdf Anatomy Of a Body Paragraph

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5.2: Writing Body Paragraphs

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Figure \(\PageIndex{1}\) - Photo by Pixabay

Introduction

If your thesis gives the reader a roadmap to your essay, then body paragraphs should closely follow that map. The reader should be able to predict what follows your introductory paragraph by simply reading the thesis statement.

The body paragraphs present the evidence you have gathered to confirm your thesis. Before you begin to support your thesis in the body, you must find information from a variety of sources that support and give credit to what you are trying to prove.

Select Primary Support for Your Thesis

Without primary support, your argument is not likely to be convincing. Primary support can be described as the major points you choose to expand on your thesis. It is the most important information you select to argue for your point of view. Each point you choose will be incorporated into the topic sentence for each body paragraph you write. Your primary supporting points are further supported by supporting details within the paragraphs.

Remember that a worthy argument is backed by examples. In order to construct a valid argument, good writers conduct lots of background research and take careful notes. They also talk to people knowledgeable about a topic in order to understand its implications before writing about it.

Identify the Characteristics of Good Primary Support

In order to fulfill the requirements of good primary support, the information you choose must meet the following standards:

• Be specific . The main points you make about your thesis and the examples you use to expand on those points need to be specific. Use specific examples to provide the evidence and to build upon your general ideas. These types of examples give your reader something narrow to focus on, and if used properly, they leave little doubt about your claim. General examples, while they convey the necessary information, are not nearly as compelling or useful in writing because they are too obvious and typical.
• Be relevant to the thesis . Primary support is considered strong when it relates directly to the thesis. Primary support should show, explain, or prove your main argument without delving into irrelevant details. When faced with lots of information that could be used to prove your thesis, you may think you need to include it all in your body paragraphs. But effective writers resist the temptation to lose focus. Choose your examples wisely by making sure they directly connect to your thesis.
• Be detailed . Remember that your thesis, while specific, should not be very detailed. The body paragraphs are where you develop the discussion that a thorough essay requires. Using detailed support shows readers that you have considered all the facts and chosen only the most precise details to enhance your point of view.

Pre-write to Identify Primary Supporting Points for a Thesis Statement

Recall that when you pre-write you essentially make a list of examples or reasons why you support your stance. Stemming from each point, you further provide details to support those reasons. After prewriting, you are then able to look back at the information and choose the most compelling pieces you will use in your body paragraphs.

Choose one of the following working thesis statements. On a separate sheet of paper, write for at least five minutes using one of the pre-writing techniques.

• Unleashed dogs on city streets are a dangerous nuisance.
• Students cheat for many different reasons.
• Drug use among teens and young adults is a problem.
• The most important change that should occur at my college or university is

Select the Most Effective Primary Supporting Points for a Thesis Statement

After you have pre-written about your working thesis statement, you may have generated a lot of information, which may be edited out later. Remember that your primary support must be relevant to your thesis. Remind yourself of your main argument, and delete any ideas that do not directly relate to it. Omitting unrelated ideas ensures that you will use only the most convincing information in your body paragraphs. Choose at least three of only the most compelling points. These will serve as the topic sentences for your body paragraphs.

Refer to the previous exercise and select three of your most compelling reasons to support the thesis statement. Remember that the points you choose must be specific and relevant to the thesis. The statements you choose will be your primary support points, and you will later incorporate them into the topic sentences for the body paragraphs.

Collaboration

Please share with a classmate and compare your answers.

When you support your thesis, you are revealing evidence. Evidence includes anything that can help support your stance. The following are the kinds of evidence you will encounter as you conduct your research:

• Facts . Facts are the best kind of evidence to use because they often cannot be disputed. They can support your stance by providing background information on or a solid foundation for your point of view. However, some facts may still need explanation. For example, the sentence “The most populated state in the United States is California” is a pure fact, but it may require some explanation to make it relevant to your specific argument.
• Judgments . Judgments are conclusions drawn from the given facts. Judgments are more credible than opinions because they are founded upon careful reasoning and examination of a topic.
• Testimony . Testimony consists of direct quotations from either an eyewitness or an expert witness. An eyewitness is someone who has direct experience with a subject; he adds authenticity to an argument based on facts. An expert witness is a person who has extensive experience with a topic. This person studies the facts and provides commentary based on either facts or judgments, or both. An expert witness adds authority and credibility to an argument.
• Personal observation . Personal observation is similar to testimony, but personal observation consists of your testimony. It reflects what you know to be true because you have experiences and have formed either opinions or judgments about them. For instance, if you are one of five children and your thesis states that being part of a large family is beneficial to a child’s social development, you could use your own experience to support your thesis.

Keep in mind that for most of the assignments in this course, you will not be using source material (researched facts, testimony) as evidence.

writing at work

In any job where you devise a plan, you will need to support the steps that you lay out. This is an area in which you would incorporate primary support into your writing. Choosing only the most specific and relevant information to expand upon the steps will ensure that your plan appears well-thought-out and precise.

You can consult a vast pool of resources to gather support for your stance. Citing relevant information from reliable sources ensures that your reader will take you seriously and consider your assertions. Use any of the following sources for your essay: newspapers or news organization websites, magazines, encyclopedias, and scholarly journals, which are periodicals that address topics in a specialized field.

Choose Supporting Topic Sentences

Each body paragraph contains a topic sentence that states one aspect of your thesis and then expands upon it. Like the thesis statement, each topic sentence should be specific and supported by concrete details, facts,or explanations.

Each body paragraph should comprise of the following elements:

\[\text{Topic sentence}\; + \text{supporting details (examples, reasons, or arguments)}\]

Topic sentences indicate the location and main points of the basic arguments of your essay. These sentences are vital to writing your body paragraphs because they always refer back to and support your thesis statement. Topic sentences are linked to the ideas you have introduced in your thesis, thus reminding readers what your essay is about. A paragraph without a clearly identified topic sentence may be unclear and scattered, just like an essay without a thesis statement.

Unless your teacher instructs otherwise, you should include at least three or more body paragraphs in your essay.

In Exercise 2, you chose three of your most convincing points to support the thesis statement you selected from the list. Take each point and incorporate it into a topic sentence for each body paragraph.

Supporting point 1: ___________________________________________________________________

Topic sentence: _______________________________________________________________________

Supporting point 2: ___________________________________________________________________

Supporting point 3: ___________________________________________________________________

Draft Supporting Detail Sentences for Each Primary Support Sentence

After deciding which primary support points you will use as your topic sentences, you must add details to clarify and demonstrate each of those points. These supporting details provide examples, facts, or evidence that support the topic sentence.

The writer drafts possible supporting detail sentences for each primary support sentence based on the thesis statement:

Thesis statement : Unleashed dogs on city streets are a dangerous nuisance.

Supporting point 1: Dogs can scare cyclists and pedestrians

Supporting details

• Cyclists are forced to zigzag on the road.
• School children panic and turn wildly on their bikes.
• People who are walking at night freeze in fear.

Supporting point 2: Loose dogs are traffic hazards.

• Dogs in the street make people swerve their cars.
• To avoid dogs, drivers run into other cars or pedestrians.
• Children coaxing dogs across busy streets create danger.

Supporting point 3: Unleashed dogs damage gardens.

• They step on flowers and vegetables.
• They destroy hedges by urinating on them.
• They mess up lawns by digging holes.

The following paragraph contains supporting detail sentences for the primary support sentence (the topic sentence), which is underlined.

Example \(\PageIndex{1}\):

Salinger, a World War II veteran, suffered from posttraumatic disorder, a disorder that influenced themes in many of his works . He did not hide his mental anguish over the horrors of war and once told his daughter, “You never really get the smell of burning flesh out of your nose, no matter how long you live.” His short story “A Perfect day for a Bananafish” details a day in the life of a WWII veteran who was recently released from an army hospital for psychiatric problems. The man acts questionably with a little girl he meets on the beach before he returns to his hotel room and commits suicide. Another short story, “for esmé – with love and Squalor,” is narrated by a traumatized soldier who sparks an unusual relationship with a young girl he meets before he departs to partake in D-Day. Finally, in Salinger’s only novel, the Catcher in the Rye, he continues with the theme of posttraumatic stress, though not directly related to war. From a rest home for the mentally ill, sixteen-year-old Holden Caulfield narrates the story of his nervous breakdown following the death of his younger brother.

Exercise \(\PageIndex{4}\)

Using the three topic sentences you composed for the thesis statement in Exercise 1, draft at least three supporting details for each point.

Thesis statement: _____________________________________________________________________

Primary supporting point 1: _____________________________________________________________

Supporting details: ____________________________________________________________________

Primary supporting point 2: _____________________________________________________________

Primary supporting point 3: _____________________________________________________________

You have the option of writing your topic sentences in one of three ways. You can state it at the beginning of the body paragraph, or at the end of the paragraph, or you do not have to write it at all. This is called an implied topic sentence. An implied topic sentence lets readers form the main idea for themselves. For beginning writers, it is best to not use implied topic sentences because it makes it harder to focus your writing. Your instructor may also want to clearly identify the sentences that support your thesis. For more information on the placement of thesis statements and implied topic statements.

Print out the first draft of your essay and use a highlighter to mark your topic sentences in the body paragraphs. Make sure they are clearly stated and accurately present your paragraphs, as well as accurately reflect your thesis. If your topic sentence contains information that does not exist in the rest of the paragraph, rewrite it to more accurately match the rest of the paragraph.

key takeaways

• Your body paragraphs should closely follow the path set forth by your thesis statement.
• Strong body paragraphs contain evidence that supports your thesis.
• Primary support comprises the most important points you use to support your thesis.
• Strong primary support is specific, detailed, and relevant to the thesis.
• Pre-writing helps you determine your most compelling primary support.
• Evidence can include facts, judgments, testimony, and personal observation.
• A topic sentence presents one point of your thesis statement while the information in the rest of the paragraph supports that point.
• A body paragraph comprises a topic sentence plus supporting details

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Traditional Academic Essays In Three Parts

Part i: the introduction.

An introduction is usually the first paragraph of your academic essay. If you’re writing a long essay, you might need 2 or 3 paragraphs to introduce your topic to your reader. A good introduction does 2 things:

• Gets the reader’s attention. You can get a reader’s attention by telling a story, providing a statistic, pointing out something strange or interesting, providing and discussing an interesting quote, etc. Be interesting and find some original angle via which to engage others in your topic.
• Provides a specific and debatable thesis statement. The thesis statement is usually just one sentence long, but it might be longer—even a whole paragraph—if the essay you’re writing is long. A good thesis statement makes a debatable point, meaning a point someone might disagree with and argue against. It also serves as a roadmap for what you argue in your paper.

Part II: The Body Paragraphs

Body paragraphs help you prove your thesis and move you along a compelling trajectory from your introduction to your conclusion. If your thesis is a simple one, you might not need a lot of body paragraphs to prove it. If it’s more complicated, you’ll need more body paragraphs. An easy way to remember the parts of a body paragraph is to think of them as the MEAT of your essay:

Main Idea. The part of a topic sentence that states the main idea of the body paragraph. All of the sentences in the paragraph connect to it. Keep in mind that main ideas are…

• like labels. They appear in the first sentence of the paragraph and tell your reader what’s inside the paragraph.
• arguable. They’re not statements of fact; they’re debatable points that you prove with evidence.
• focused. Make a specific point in each paragraph and then prove that point.

Evidence. The parts of a paragraph that prove the main idea. You might include different types of evidence in different sentences. Keep in mind that different disciplines have different ideas about what counts as evidence and they adhere to different citation styles. Examples of evidence include…

• quotations and/or paraphrases from sources.
• facts , e.g. statistics or findings from studies you’ve conducted.
• narratives and/or descriptions , e.g. of your own experiences.

Analysis. The parts of a paragraph that explain the evidence. Make sure you tie the evidence you provide back to the paragraph’s main idea. In other words, discuss the evidence.

Transition. The part of a paragraph that helps you move fluidly from the last paragraph. Transitions appear in topic sentences along with main ideas, and they look both backward and forward in order to help you connect your ideas for your reader. Don’t end paragraphs with transitions; start with them.

Keep in mind that MEAT does not occur in that order. The “ T ransition” and the “ M ain Idea” often combine to form the first sentence—the topic sentence—and then paragraphs contain multiple sentences of evidence and analysis. For example, a paragraph might look like this: TM. E. E. A. E. E. A. A.

Part III: The Conclusion

A conclusion is the last paragraph of your essay, or, if you’re writing a really long essay, you might need 2 or 3 paragraphs to conclude. A conclusion typically does one of two things—or, of course, it can do both:

• Summarizes the argument. Some instructors expect you not to say anything new in your conclusion. They just want you to restate your main points. Especially if you’ve made a long and complicated argument, it’s useful to restate your main points for your reader by the time you’ve gotten to your conclusion. If you opt to do so, keep in mind that you should use different language than you used in your introduction and your body paragraphs. The introduction and conclusion shouldn’t be the same.
• For example, your argument might be significant to studies of a certain time period .
• Alternately, it might be significant to a certain geographical region .
• Alternately still, it might influence how your readers think about the future . You might even opt to speculate about the future and/or call your readers to action in your conclusion.

Handout by Dr. Liliana Naydan. Do not reproduce without permission.

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4.2 – Writing Body Paragraphs

Learning objectives.

• Select primary support related to your thesis.
• Support your topic sentences.

If your thesis gives the reader a roadmap to your essay, then body paragraphs should closely follow that map. The reader should be able to predict what follows your introductory paragraph by simply reading the thesis statement.

The body paragraphs present the evidence you have gathered to confirm your thesis. Before you begin to support your thesis in the body, you must find information from a variety of sources that support and give credit to what you are trying to prove.

Select Primary Support for Your Thesis

Without primary support, your argument is not likely to be convincing. Primary support can be described as the major points you choose to expand on your thesis. It is the most important information you select to argue for your point of view. Each point you choose will be incorporated into the topic sentence for each body paragraph you write. Your primary supporting points are further supported by supporting details within the paragraphs.

Remember that a worthy argument is backed by examples. In order to construct a valid argument, good writers conduct lots of background research and take careful notes. They also talk to people knowledgeable about a topic in order to understand its implications before writing about it.

Information from research sources will improve your paper, supporting your points with more detail and building your credibility.  As you work on your paper, always remember to note what information comes from sources so you can avoid plagiarism.

Identify the Characteristics of Good Primary Support

In order to fulfill the requirements of good primary support, the information you choose must meet the following standards:

• Be specific. The main points you make about your thesis and the examples you use to expand on those points need to be specific. Use specific examples to provide the evidence and to build upon your general ideas. These types of examples give your reader something narrow to focus on, and if used properly, they leave little doubt about your claim. General examples, while they convey the necessary information, are not nearly as compelling or useful in writing because they are too obvious and typical.
• Be relevant to the thesis. Primary support is considered strong when it relates directly to the thesis. Primary support should show, explain, or prove your main argument without delving into irrelevant details. When faced with lots of information that could be used to prove your thesis, you may think you need to include it all in your body paragraphs. But effective writers resist the temptation to lose focus. Choose your examples wisely by making sure they directly connect to your thesis.
• Be detailed. Remember that your thesis, while specific, should not be very detailed. The body paragraphs are where you develop the discussion that a thorough essay requires. Using detailed support shows readers that you have considered all the facts and chosen only the most precise details to enhance your point of view.
• Be relevant. As you add in detailed support, choose sources carefully. Aim to find recent sources that are up to date and relevant. Carefully evaluate your sources, following the suggestions in 6.3 – The CRAAP Test And Evaluating Resources

Prewrite to Identify Primary Supporting Points for a Thesis Statement

Recall that when you prewrite you essentially make a list of examples or reasons why you support your stance. Stemming from each point, you further provide details to support those reasons. After prewriting, you are then able to look back at the information and choose the most compelling pieces you will use in your body paragraphs.

Choose one of the following working thesis statements. On a separate sheet of paper, write for at least five minutes using one of the prewriting techniques you learned in Chapter 3 “The Writing Process: How Do I Begin?” .

• Unleashed dogs on city streets are a dangerous nuisance.
• Students cheat for many different reasons.
• There are many advantages to taking time to go outdoors.
• The most important change that should occur at my college is:

Select the Most Effective Primary Supporting Points for a Thesis Statement

After you have prewritten about your working thesis statement, you may have generated a lot of information, which may be edited out later. Remind yourself of your main argument, and delete any ideas that do not directly relate to it. Omitting unrelated ideas ensures that you will use only the most convincing information in your body paragraphs. Choose at least three of only the most compelling points. These will serve as the topic sentences for your body paragraphs.

When you support your thesis, you are revealing evidence. Evidence includes anything that can help support your stance. The following are the kinds of evidence you will encounter as you conduct your research:

• Facts. Facts are the best kind of evidence to use because they often cannot be disputed. They can support your stance by providing background information on or a solid foundation for your point of view. However, some facts may still need explanation. For example, the sentence “Ontario is the most populated province in Canada” is a pure fact, but it may require some explanation to make it relevant to your specific argument.  The facts you present in any paper should come from credible research sources, which you evaluate carefully.
• Judgments.  Judgments are conclusions drawn from the given facts. Judgments are more credible than opinions because they are founded upon careful reasoning and examination of a topic.  Evaluate your research sources carefully to confirm that they share the judgment of true authorities on the topic.  Follow the advice in 6.3 – The CRAAP Test And Evaluating Resources
• Testimony. Testimony consists of direct quotations from either an eyewitness or an expert witness. An eyewitness is someone who has direct experience with a subject; she adds authenticity to an argument based on facts. An expert witness is a person who has extensive experience with a topic. This person studies the facts and provides commentary based on either facts or judgments, or both. An expert witness adds authority and credibility to an argument.
• Personal observation. Personal observation is similar to testimony, but personal observation consists of your testimony. It reflects what you know to be true because you have experiences and have formed either opinions or judgments about them. For instance, if you are one of five children and your thesis states that being part of a large family is beneficial to a child’s social development, you could use your own experience to support your thesis.

Types of Supporting Facts

Determine whether the supporting points are facts, judgements,  personal observation, or  testimony.

• The most populated province in Canada is Ontario.
• I don’t think Mr. John will be able to complete the marathon.
• Mrs. Marshall saw Mike eating the last piece of cake.
• My dad loves to eat his steak well done.

Check your Answers: [1]

Activity Source: “ Pre-Chapter Review (6) ” by Brenna Clark Gray (H5P Adaptation) is based on content from Writing for Success – 1st Canadian Edition by Tara Harkoff & [author removed], licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 4.0.

Writing at Work

You can consult a vast pool of resources to gather support for your stance. Citing relevant information from reliable sources ensures that your reader will take you seriously and consider your assertions. Use any of the following sources for your essay: newspapers or news organization websites, magazines, encyclopedias, and scholarly journals, which are periodicals that address topics in a specialized field.

Watch Evaluating sources for credibility on YouTube (4 mins)

Video source: IT Sligo Centre for Online Learning. (2016, April 12). Evaluating sources for credibility [Video]. YouTube. https://youtu.be/v8DfTTmdQ04

Choose Supporting Topic Sentences

Each body paragraph contains a topic sentence that states one aspect of your thesis and then expands upon it. Like the thesis statement, each topic sentence should be specific and supported by concrete details, facts, or explanations.

Each body paragraph should comprise the following elements:

          topic sentence + supporting details (examples, reasons, or arguments)

As you read in Chapter 3 “The Writing Process: How Do I Begin?” , topic sentences indicate the location and main points of the basic arguments of your essay. These sentences are vital to writing your body paragraphs because they always refer back to and support your thesis statement. Topic sentences are linked to the ideas you have introduced in your thesis, thus reminding readers what your essay is about. A paragraph without a clearly identified topic sentence may be unclear and scattered, just like an essay without a thesis statement.

Unless your teacher instructs otherwise, you should include at least three body paragraphs in your essay. A five-paragraph essay, including the introduction and conclusion, is commonly the standard for exams and essay assignments.

Consider the following the thesis statement:

There’s more to academic success than just studying; activities outside the classroom, such as spending time outdoors, engaging in social activities, and getting enough sleep can all help to improve a student’s overall learning experience.

The following topic sentence is a primary support point for the thesis. The topic sentence states exactly what the controlling idea of the paragraph is. Later, you will see the writer immediately provide support for the sentence.

Time spent outdoors benefits students, as exposure to sunlight, a break from digital devices, and interaction with natural scenery all provide benefits that boost academic performance.

In “Exercise 2” above, you chose three of your most convincing points to support the thesis statement you selected from the list. Take each point and incorporate it into a topic sentence for each body paragraph.

Supporting point 1:

Topic sentence:

Supporting point 2:

Supporting point 3:

Draft Supporting Detail Sentences for Each Primary Support Sentence

After deciding which primary support points you will use as your topic sentences, you must add details to clarify and demonstrate each of those points. These supporting details provide examples, facts, or evidence that support the topic sentence.

The writer drafts possible supporting detail sentences for each primary support sentence based on the thesis statement:

Sample supporting detail sentences

Essay Thesis statement:

There is more to academic success than just studying; activities outside the classroom, such as spending time outdoors, engaging in social activities, and getting enough sleep can all help to improve a student’s overall learning experience.

• Sunlight elevates vitamin D, melatonin, and serotonin which improve cognitive function (Oglethorpe, 2012).
• Taking a rest from digital devices improves the brain (Selhub, 2015).
• Natural surroundings can reduce ADHD symptoms and attention fatigue, and walking outdoors among greenery improved school performance (Kuo & Taylor, 2004).
• Students who participate in extra-curricular activities had consistently higher grades (Abdelhafifdh et al., 2022).
•  Students who are active in sports also perform better in school (Burns, et al., 2020).
• Studies show that sleep deprivation reduces memory (Okano, et al., 2019).
• Consistent sleep quality while subjects were studied results in improved test scores (Okano, et al., 2019).
• People do better on challenging tasks after they’ve had sufficient sleep (Alhola & Polo-Kantola, 2007).

Abdelhafifdh, S., Abdelhafifh, S., & Moussa, A. (2022). To what extent extracurricular activities affect the behaviours and school grades of primary schools’ pupils. Open Access Library Journal , 9, 1-14. https://doi.org/10.4236/oalib.1108502

Alhola, P., & Polo-Kantola, P. (2007). Sleep deprivation: Impact on cognitive performance.  Neuropsychiatric disease and treatment ,  3 (5), 553–567.

Burns, R. D., Brusseau, T. A., Pfledderer, C. D., & Fu, Y. (2020). Sports participation correlates with academic achievement: Results from a large adolescent sample within the 2017 U.S. National Youth Risk Behavior Survey. Perceptual and Motor Skills , 127 (2), 448–467. https://doi.org/10.1177/0031512519900055

Kuo, F. E., & Taylor, A. F. (2004). A potential natural treatment for attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder: evidence from a national study. American Journal of Public Health , 94 (9), 1580–1586. https://doi.org/10.2105/AJPH.94.9.1580

Oglethorpe, A. (2012). Dim wits. Psychology Today , 45 (1), 43.

Okano, K., Kaczmarzyk, J. R., Dave, N., Gabrieli, J. D. E., & Grossman, J. C. (2019). Sleep quality, duration, and consistency are associated with better academic performance in college students. NPJ Science of Learning ,  4 (1), 1–5. https://doi.org/10.1038/s41539-019-0055-z

Selhub, E. (2015). Nature and the brain. Alive. https://www.alive.com/health/nature-and-the-brain/

The following paragraph contains supporting detail sentences for the primary support sentence (the topic sentence – the very first one in the paragraph), which is underlined.

Sample paragraph with supporting detail sentences

Oglethorpe, A. (2012). Dim Wits. Psychology Today , 45 (1), 43.

Using the three topic sentences you just composed for the thesis statement in “Exercise 3”, draft at least three supporting details for each point.

Thesis statement:

Primary supporting point 1:

Supporting details:

Primary supporting point 2:

Primary supporting point 3:

Print out the first draft of your essay and use a highlighter to mark your topic sentences in the body paragraphs. Make sure they are clearly stated and accurately present your paragraphs, as well as accurately reflect your thesis. If your topic sentence contains information that does not exist in the rest of the paragraph, rewrite it to more accurately match the rest of the paragraph.

Key Takeaways

• Your body paragraphs should closely follow the path set forth by your thesis statement.
• Strong body paragraphs contain evidence that supports your thesis.
• Primary support comprises the most important points you use to support your thesis.
• Strong primary support is specific, detailed, and relevant to the thesis.
• Prewriting helps you determine your most compelling primary support.
• Evidence includes facts, judgments, testimony, and personal observation.
• Reliable sources may include newspapers, magazines, academic journals, books, encyclopedias, and firsthand testimony.
• A topic sentence presents one point of your thesis statement while the information in the rest of the paragraph supports that point.
• A body paragraph comprises a topic sentence plus supporting details.

Attribution & References

Except where otherwise noted, this chapter is adapted from ” 9.2 Writing Body Paragraphs ” In Writing for Success by University of Minnesota licensed under CC BY-NC 4.0 .

• 1. fact, 2.  judgement, 3. testimony, 4. Personal observation ↵

Communication Essentials for College Copyright © 2022 by Jen Booth, Emily Cramer & Amanda Quibell, Georgian College is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 4.0 International License , except where otherwise noted.

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Developing a Thesis Statement

Many papers you write require developing a thesis statement. In this section you’ll learn what a thesis statement is and how to write one.

Keep in mind that not all papers require thesis statements . If in doubt, please consult your instructor for assistance.

What is a thesis statement?

A thesis statement . . .

• Makes an argumentative assertion about a topic; it states the conclusions that you have reached about your topic.
• Makes a promise to the reader about the scope, purpose, and direction of your paper.
• Is focused and specific enough to be “proven” within the boundaries of your paper.
• Is generally located near the end of the introduction ; sometimes, in a long paper, the thesis will be expressed in several sentences or in an entire paragraph.
• Identifies the relationships between the pieces of evidence that you are using to support your argument.

Not all papers require thesis statements! Ask your instructor if you’re in doubt whether you need one.

Identify a topic

Your topic is the subject about which you will write. Your assignment may suggest several ways of looking at a topic; or it may name a fairly general concept that you will explore or analyze in your paper.

Consider what your assignment asks you to do

Inform yourself about your topic, focus on one aspect of your topic, ask yourself whether your topic is worthy of your efforts, generate a topic from an assignment.

Below are some possible topics based on sample assignments.

Sample assignment 1

Analyze Spain’s neutrality in World War II.

Identified topic

Franco’s role in the diplomatic relationships between the Allies and the Axis

This topic avoids generalities such as “Spain” and “World War II,” addressing instead on Franco’s role (a specific aspect of “Spain”) and the diplomatic relations between the Allies and Axis (a specific aspect of World War II).

Sample assignment 2

Analyze one of Homer’s epic similes in the Iliad.

The relationship between the portrayal of warfare and the epic simile about Simoisius at 4.547-64.

This topic focuses on a single simile and relates it to a single aspect of the Iliad ( warfare being a major theme in that work).

Developing a Thesis Statement–Additional information

Your assignment may suggest several ways of looking at a topic, or it may name a fairly general concept that you will explore or analyze in your paper. You’ll want to read your assignment carefully, looking for key terms that you can use to focus your topic.

Sample assignment: Analyze Spain’s neutrality in World War II Key terms: analyze, Spain’s neutrality, World War II

After you’ve identified the key words in your topic, the next step is to read about them in several sources, or generate as much information as possible through an analysis of your topic. Obviously, the more material or knowledge you have, the more possibilities will be available for a strong argument. For the sample assignment above, you’ll want to look at books and articles on World War II in general, and Spain’s neutrality in particular.

As you consider your options, you must decide to focus on one aspect of your topic. This means that you cannot include everything you’ve learned about your topic, nor should you go off in several directions. If you end up covering too many different aspects of a topic, your paper will sprawl and be unconvincing in its argument, and it most likely will not fulfull the assignment requirements.

For the sample assignment above, both Spain’s neutrality and World War II are topics far too broad to explore in a paper. You may instead decide to focus on Franco’s role in the diplomatic relationships between the Allies and the Axis , which narrows down what aspects of Spain’s neutrality and World War II you want to discuss, as well as establishes a specific link between those two aspects.

Before you go too far, however, ask yourself whether your topic is worthy of your efforts. Try to avoid topics that already have too much written about them (i.e., “eating disorders and body image among adolescent women”) or that simply are not important (i.e. “why I like ice cream”). These topics may lead to a thesis that is either dry fact or a weird claim that cannot be supported. A good thesis falls somewhere between the two extremes. To arrive at this point, ask yourself what is new, interesting, contestable, or controversial about your topic.

As you work on your thesis, remember to keep the rest of your paper in mind at all times . Sometimes your thesis needs to evolve as you develop new insights, find new evidence, or take a different approach to your topic.

Derive a main point from topic

Once you have a topic, you will have to decide what the main point of your paper will be. This point, the “controlling idea,” becomes the core of your argument (thesis statement) and it is the unifying idea to which you will relate all your sub-theses. You can then turn this “controlling idea” into a purpose statement about what you intend to do in your paper.

Look for patterns in your evidence

Compose a purpose statement.

Consult the examples below for suggestions on how to look for patterns in your evidence and construct a purpose statement.

• Franco first tried to negotiate with the Axis
• Franco turned to the Allies when he couldn’t get some concessions that he wanted from the Axis

Possible conclusion:

Spain’s neutrality in WWII occurred for an entirely personal reason: Franco’s desire to preserve his own (and Spain’s) power.

Purpose statement

This paper will analyze Franco’s diplomacy during World War II to see how it contributed to Spain’s neutrality.

• The simile compares Simoisius to a tree, which is a peaceful, natural image.
• The tree in the simile is chopped down to make wheels for a chariot, which is an object used in warfare.

At first, the simile seems to take the reader away from the world of warfare, but we end up back in that world by the end.

This paper will analyze the way the simile about Simoisius at 4.547-64 moves in and out of the world of warfare.

Derive purpose statement from topic

To find out what your “controlling idea” is, you have to examine and evaluate your evidence . As you consider your evidence, you may notice patterns emerging, data repeated in more than one source, or facts that favor one view more than another. These patterns or data may then lead you to some conclusions about your topic and suggest that you can successfully argue for one idea better than another.

For instance, you might find out that Franco first tried to negotiate with the Axis, but when he couldn’t get some concessions that he wanted from them, he turned to the Allies. As you read more about Franco’s decisions, you may conclude that Spain’s neutrality in WWII occurred for an entirely personal reason: his desire to preserve his own (and Spain’s) power. Based on this conclusion, you can then write a trial thesis statement to help you decide what material belongs in your paper.

Sometimes you won’t be able to find a focus or identify your “spin” or specific argument immediately. Like some writers, you might begin with a purpose statement just to get yourself going. A purpose statement is one or more sentences that announce your topic and indicate the structure of the paper but do not state the conclusions you have drawn . Thus, you might begin with something like this:

• This paper will look at modern language to see if it reflects male dominance or female oppression.
• I plan to analyze anger and derision in offensive language to see if they represent a challenge of society’s authority.

At some point, you can turn a purpose statement into a thesis statement. As you think and write about your topic, you can restrict, clarify, and refine your argument, crafting your thesis statement to reflect your thinking.

As you work on your thesis, remember to keep the rest of your paper in mind at all times. Sometimes your thesis needs to evolve as you develop new insights, find new evidence, or take a different approach to your topic.

Compose a draft thesis statement

If you are writing a paper that will have an argumentative thesis and are having trouble getting started, the techniques in the table below may help you develop a temporary or “working” thesis statement.

Begin with a purpose statement that you will later turn into a thesis statement.

Assignment: Discuss the history of the Reform Party and explain its influence on the 1990 presidential and Congressional election.

Purpose Statement: This paper briefly sketches the history of the grassroots, conservative, Perot-led Reform Party and analyzes how it influenced the economic and social ideologies of the two mainstream parties.

Question-to-Assertion

If your assignment asks a specific question(s), turn the question(s) into an assertion and give reasons why it is true or reasons for your opinion.

Assignment : What do Aylmer and Rappaccini have to be proud of? Why aren’t they satisfied with these things? How does pride, as demonstrated in “The Birthmark” and “Rappaccini’s Daughter,” lead to unexpected problems?

Beginning thesis statement: Alymer and Rappaccinni are proud of their great knowledge; however, they are also very greedy and are driven to use their knowledge to alter some aspect of nature as a test of their ability. Evil results when they try to “play God.”

Write a sentence that summarizes the main idea of the essay you plan to write.

Main idea: The reason some toys succeed in the market is that they appeal to the consumers’ sense of the ridiculous and their basic desire to laugh at themselves.

Make a list of the ideas that you want to include; consider the ideas and try to group them.

• nature = peaceful
• war matériel = violent (competes with 1?)
• need for time and space to mourn the dead
• war is inescapable (competes with 3?)

Use a formula to arrive at a working thesis statement (you will revise this later).

• although most readers of _______ have argued that _______, closer examination shows that _______.
• _______ uses _______ and _____ to prove that ________.
• phenomenon x is a result of the combination of __________, __________, and _________.

What to keep in mind as you draft an initial thesis statement

Beginning statements obtained through the methods illustrated above can serve as a framework for planning or drafting your paper, but remember they’re not yet the specific, argumentative thesis you want for the final version of your paper. In fact, in its first stages, a thesis statement usually is ill-formed or rough and serves only as a planning tool.

As you write, you may discover evidence that does not fit your temporary or “working” thesis. Or you may reach deeper insights about your topic as you do more research, and you will find that your thesis statement has to be more complicated to match the evidence that you want to use.

You must be willing to reject or omit some evidence in order to keep your paper cohesive and your reader focused. Or you may have to revise your thesis to match the evidence and insights that you want to discuss. Read your draft carefully, noting the conclusions you have drawn and the major ideas which support or prove those conclusions. These will be the elements of your final thesis statement.

Sometimes you will not be able to identify these elements in your early drafts, but as you consider how your argument is developing and how your evidence supports your main idea, ask yourself, “ What is the main point that I want to prove/discuss? ” and “ How will I convince the reader that this is true? ” When you can answer these questions, then you can begin to refine the thesis statement.

Refine and polish the thesis statement

To get to your final thesis, you’ll need to refine your draft thesis so that it’s specific and arguable.

• Ask if your draft thesis addresses the assignment
• Question each part of your draft thesis
• Clarify vague phrases and assertions
• Investigate alternatives to your draft thesis

Consult the example below for suggestions on how to refine your draft thesis statement.

Sample Assignment

Choose an activity and define it as a symbol of American culture. Your essay should cause the reader to think critically about the society which produces and enjoys that activity.

• Ask The phenomenon of drive-in facilities is an interesting symbol of american culture, and these facilities demonstrate significant characteristics of our society.This statement does not fulfill the assignment because it does not require the reader to think critically about society.

Drive-ins are an interesting symbol of American culture because they represent Americans’ significant creativity and business ingenuity.

Among the types of drive-in facilities familiar during the twentieth century, drive-in movie theaters best represent American creativity, not merely because they were the forerunner of later drive-ins and drive-throughs, but because of their impact on our culture: they changed our relationship to the automobile, changed the way people experienced movies, and changed movie-going into a family activity.

While drive-in facilities such as those at fast-food establishments, banks, pharmacies, and dry cleaners symbolize America’s economic ingenuity, they also have affected our personal standards.

While drive-in facilities such as those at fast- food restaurants, banks, pharmacies, and dry cleaners symbolize (1) Americans’ business ingenuity, they also have contributed (2) to an increasing homogenization of our culture, (3) a willingness to depersonalize relationships with others, and (4) a tendency to sacrifice quality for convenience.

This statement is now specific and fulfills all parts of the assignment. This version, like any good thesis, is not self-evident; its points, 1-4, will have to be proven with evidence in the body of the paper. The numbers in this statement indicate the order in which the points will be presented. Depending on the length of the paper, there could be one paragraph for each numbered item or there could be blocks of paragraph for even pages for each one.

Complete the final thesis statement

The bottom line.

As you move through the process of crafting a thesis, you’ll need to remember four things:

• Context matters! Think about your course materials and lectures. Try to relate your thesis to the ideas your instructor is discussing.
• As you go through the process described in this section, always keep your assignment in mind . You will be more successful when your thesis (and paper) responds to the assignment than if it argues a semi-related idea.
• Your thesis statement should be precise, focused, and contestable ; it should predict the sub-theses or blocks of information that you will use to prove your argument.
• Make sure that you keep the rest of your paper in mind at all times. Change your thesis as your paper evolves, because you do not want your thesis to promise more than your paper actually delivers.

In the beginning, the thesis statement was a tool to help you sharpen your focus, limit material and establish the paper’s purpose. When your paper is finished, however, the thesis statement becomes a tool for your reader. It tells the reader what you have learned about your topic and what evidence led you to your conclusion. It keeps the reader on track–well able to understand and appreciate your argument.

Writing Process and Structure

This is an accordion element with a series of buttons that open and close related content panels.

Getting Started with Your Paper

Interpreting Writing Assignments from Your Courses

Generating Ideas for

Creating an Argument

Thesis vs. Purpose Statements

Architecture of Arguments

Working with Sources

Quoting and Paraphrasing Sources

Using Literary Quotations

Citing Sources in Your Paper

Drafting Your Paper

Generating Ideas for Your Paper

Introductions

Paragraphing

Developing Strategic Transitions

Conclusions

Revising Your Paper

Peer Reviews

Reverse Outlines

Revising an Argumentative Paper

Revision Strategies for Longer Projects

Finishing Your Paper

Twelve Common Errors: An Editing Checklist

How to Proofread your Paper

Writing Collaboratively

Collaborative and Group Writing

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Writing a Paper: Thesis Statements

Basics of thesis statements.

The thesis statement is the brief articulation of your paper's central argument and purpose. You might hear it referred to as simply a "thesis." Every scholarly paper should have a thesis statement, and strong thesis statements are concise, specific, and arguable. Concise means the thesis is short: perhaps one or two sentences for a shorter paper. Specific means the thesis deals with a narrow and focused topic, appropriate to the paper's length. Arguable means that a scholar in your field could disagree (or perhaps already has!).

Strong thesis statements address specific intellectual questions, have clear positions, and use a structure that reflects the overall structure of the paper. Read on to learn more about constructing a strong thesis statement.

Being Specific

This thesis statement has no specific argument:

Needs Improvement: In this essay, I will examine two scholarly articles to find similarities and differences.

This statement is concise, but it is neither specific nor arguable—a reader might wonder, "Which scholarly articles? What is the topic of this paper? What field is the author writing in?" Additionally, the purpose of the paper—to "examine…to find similarities and differences" is not of a scholarly level. Identifying similarities and differences is a good first step, but strong academic argument goes further, analyzing what those similarities and differences might mean or imply.

Better: In this essay, I will argue that Bowler's (2003) autocratic management style, when coupled with Smith's (2007) theory of social cognition, can reduce the expenses associated with employee turnover.

The new revision here is still concise, as well as specific and arguable.  We can see that it is specific because the writer is mentioning (a) concrete ideas and (b) exact authors.  We can also gather the field (business) and the topic (management and employee turnover). The statement is arguable because the student goes beyond merely comparing; he or she draws conclusions from that comparison ("can reduce the expenses associated with employee turnover").

Making a Unique Argument

This thesis draft repeats the language of the writing prompt without making a unique argument:

Needs Improvement: The purpose of this essay is to monitor, assess, and evaluate an educational program for its strengths and weaknesses. Then, I will provide suggestions for improvement.

You can see here that the student has simply stated the paper's assignment, without articulating specifically how he or she will address it. The student can correct this error simply by phrasing the thesis statement as a specific answer to the assignment prompt.

Better: Through a series of student interviews, I found that Kennedy High School's antibullying program was ineffective. In order to address issues of conflict between students, I argue that Kennedy High School should embrace policies outlined by the California Department of Education (2010).

Words like "ineffective" and "argue" show here that the student has clearly thought through the assignment and analyzed the material; he or she is putting forth a specific and debatable position. The concrete information ("student interviews," "antibullying") further prepares the reader for the body of the paper and demonstrates how the student has addressed the assignment prompt without just restating that language.

Creating a Debate

This thesis statement includes only obvious fact or plot summary instead of argument:

Needs Improvement: Leadership is an important quality in nurse educators.

A good strategy to determine if your thesis statement is too broad (and therefore, not arguable) is to ask yourself, "Would a scholar in my field disagree with this point?" Here, we can see easily that no scholar is likely to argue that leadership is an unimportant quality in nurse educators.  The student needs to come up with a more arguable claim, and probably a narrower one; remember that a short paper needs a more focused topic than a dissertation.

Better: Roderick's (2009) theory of participatory leadership  is particularly appropriate to nurse educators working within the emergency medicine field, where students benefit most from collegial and kinesthetic learning.

Here, the student has identified a particular type of leadership ("participatory leadership"), narrowing the topic, and has made an arguable claim (this type of leadership is "appropriate" to a specific type of nurse educator). Conceivably, a scholar in the nursing field might disagree with this approach. The student's paper can now proceed, providing specific pieces of evidence to support the arguable central claim.

Choosing the Right Words

This thesis statement uses large or scholarly-sounding words that have no real substance:

Needs Improvement: Scholars should work to seize metacognitive outcomes by harnessing discipline-based networks to empower collaborative infrastructures.

There are many words in this sentence that may be buzzwords in the student's field or key terms taken from other texts, but together they do not communicate a clear, specific meaning. Sometimes students think scholarly writing means constructing complex sentences using special language, but actually it's usually a stronger choice to write clear, simple sentences. When in doubt, remember that your ideas should be complex, not your sentence structure.

Better: Ecologists should work to educate the U.S. public on conservation methods by making use of local and national green organizations to create a widespread communication plan.

Notice in the revision that the field is now clear (ecology), and the language has been made much more field-specific ("conservation methods," "green organizations"), so the reader is able to see concretely the ideas the student is communicating.

Leaving Room for Discussion

This thesis statement is not capable of development or advancement in the paper:

Needs Improvement: There are always alternatives to illegal drug use.

This sample thesis statement makes a claim, but it is not a claim that will sustain extended discussion. This claim is the type of claim that might be appropriate for the conclusion of a paper, but in the beginning of the paper, the student is left with nowhere to go. What further points can be made? If there are "always alternatives" to the problem the student is identifying, then why bother developing a paper around that claim? Ideally, a thesis statement should be complex enough to explore over the length of the entire paper.

Better: The most effective treatment plan for methamphetamine addiction may be a combination of pharmacological and cognitive therapy, as argued by Baker (2008), Smith (2009), and Xavier (2011).

In the revised thesis, you can see the student make a specific, debatable claim that has the potential to generate several pages' worth of discussion. When drafting a thesis statement, think about the questions your thesis statement will generate: What follow-up inquiries might a reader have? In the first example, there are almost no additional questions implied, but the revised example allows for a good deal more exploration.

Thesis Mad Libs

If you are having trouble getting started, try using the models below to generate a rough model of a thesis statement! These models are intended for drafting purposes only and should not appear in your final work.

• In this essay, I argue ____, using ______ to assert _____.
• While scholars have often argued ______, I argue______, because_______.
• Through an analysis of ______, I argue ______, which is important because_______.

Words to Avoid and to Embrace

When drafting your thesis statement, avoid words like explore, investigate, learn, compile, summarize , and explain to describe the main purpose of your paper. These words imply a paper that summarizes or "reports," rather than synthesizing and analyzing.

Instead of the terms above, try words like argue, critique, question , and interrogate . These more analytical words may help you begin strongly, by articulating a specific, critical, scholarly position.

Read Kayla's blog post for tips on taking a stand in a well-crafted thesis statement.

Related Resources

Didn't find what you need? Email us at [email protected] .

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This Writing Checklist Will Help You Ace Your Final Paper

• Organization
• Word Choice
• Introduction
• Formatting and Finishing Touches

By Lyndsey Gresehover

You’ve completed the brainstorming and research. You have created an essay outline that serves as your roadmap (or “skeleton” as some call it) and have even finished the writing. However, there is still one more equally important step to ensure your paper has all the required elements … your writing checklist.

Checklists are tools we use in lots of things we do. Think about those to-do lists you make, the sticky note reminders you leave around the house, and even the alerts you set up and save on your phone. All of these are strategies to remind ourselves of what we need to do. The same goes for writing checklists.

An easy way to make certain that you have included the essential components in writing a final paper is to break down the checklist into seven areas:

• Word choice
• Introduction paragraph
• Body paragraphs
• Conclusion paragraph
• Formatting and finishing touches

Then take a look into each area and focus on exactly what is needed.

1. Organization ✅

• Did you include the correct number of paragraphs? Depending on the type of paper you’re writing, this can vary. It’s important to discuss the minimum and maximum number of paragraphs with your teacher.
• Are your paragraphs in a logical and cohesive order?
• Does your paper provide a clear focus?

Learn more about the importance and structure of a thesis statement at our article for the term.

2. Mechanics ✅

• Did you read your paper out loud to check for any grammatical errors? Did you write in complete sentences, punctuate correctly, and use a spell checker? Dictionary’s Grammar Coach ™ uses machine learning technology uniquely designed to catch grammar and spelling errors.
• Are you varying sentence structure? You want to use a combination of simple, compound, complex, and compound-complex sentences.

3. Word choice ✅

•  Are you using effective, age-appropriate vocabulary words ?
•  Did you use sensory and/or figurative language in your writing? This makes it more entertaining for the reader and is a great way to describe and show comparisons in your writing.
• Do you include strong adjectives and verbs? For example, instead of using the verb ran , you could use dart , dash , or scurry . Again, a great idea would be to take advantage of Dictionary’s Grammar Coach™. Its Synonym Swap will find the best nouns, adjectives, and more to guide you toward clearer, stronger, writing.

4. Introduction paragraph ✅

• Check to see that you included a strong hook that will grab the reader’s attention. An engaging hook could be a quote, statistic, fact, or anecdote .
• Did you include background information on your topic?
• Does your thesis statement include a claim as well as reasons to support the claim?
• Is your thesis the last sentence in the intro paragraph?

We know writing that thesis statement can be confounding! Thankfully we have a helpful guide for you on how to do it.

5. Body paragraphs ✅

• Does each body paragraph begin with a topic sentence that introduces your reason for that paragraph?
• Does each body paragraph have at least two pieces of evidence from outside sources (trusted website, book, etc.)?
• Did you properly cite any evidence that was not your own using either quotations or stating where the information was found?
• Did every body paragraph include a concluding statement?

6. Conclusion paragraph ✅

• Did you restate the thesis statement without saying exactly what you stated in the introduction paragraph? This time, it should force the reader to think even deeper about the topic.
• Did you summarize the main points or reasons addressed in the paper?
• Was your concluding statement a call to action that will force the reader to believe in what was written?

Start your conclusion off right with these nuanced alternatives to saying “in conclusion.”

7. Formatting and finishing touches ✅

Formatting of the paper.

An area that is often overlooked is how to correctly format the paper. First, make sure that the font you use is Times New Roman size 12, and double space all lines. Both MLA and Chicago formatting styles suggest doing so for legibility. The rest of the style guidelines cited will refer to MLA style.

According to MLA style, you should format a title page like so:

• The title page should include the page number at the top, on the right side of page.
• In the center of the paper, halfway down the page, put the title of your paper.
• The next line should have your first and last name.
• On the next line, put your teacher’s name.
• On the last line, add the date.
• Again, all lines should be double-spaced, even the title page.

In-text citations

When citing information from outside sources within your paper, there are a couple things to keep in mind. MLA style is one citation style widely used by schools, academic departments, and instructors. According to MLA style:

• When using someone else’s information, you must cite the source by putting in parentheses the author’s last name followed by a comma and the page or paragraph number you found the information on, like so: (Cisneros 56)
• If you’re citing the information word for word, the information must be placed in quotation marks: In The House on Mango Street , Esperanza’s aunt encourages her to keep writing, as “It will keep you free” (Cisneros 56).

Works cited page

The following information will be needed when citing a source on your works cited page.

• Title of source
• Title of the container
• Other contributors
• Publication Date
• Location of the source (such as URL or page range)

For example:

Nordhaus, William D. “After Kyoto: Alternative Mechanisms to Control Global Warming.” American Economic Review , vol. 96, no. 2, 2006, pp. 31-34.

Using a free tool such as Easybib.com can help you to format your works cited page correctly.

Submitting your paper

Another discussion that you will want to have with your teacher (if he/she hasn’t already made this clear) is how they would like you to submit the paper. Do they want you to print the paper and turn it in in person, or would they like you to submit the paper digitally? Depending on the course and what learning management system (LMS) is used (Blackboard, Canvas, Google Classroom, Schoology, etc.) you will likely have the assignment created by the teacher and then submit it accordingly. Again, this varies based on the LMS that is used.

Following a coherent checklist will help you not only to become a better writer, but it will also make certain that you include all of the necessary elements that make up a great paper.

In addition, it’s important to have a peer look over your paper using the checklist. Having a double set of eyes is always helpful as the peer reviewer may catch mistakes that you missed or offer ideas that you didn’t think of originally.

To help get you started using the checklist strategy, we have an interactive digital and printable list that incorporates all of the necessary requirements that should be included in your paper. You can access this resource here . Feel free to print if you would like a checklist that you can write on.

An extra effort now will pay off in the long run when you turn in a final paper that impresses your teachers!

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Lyndsey Gresehover is a middle school ELA teacher, curriculum designer, and published blogger. You can view her tech-infused, innovative resources at her Teachers Pay Teachers store, Lit with Lyns . She also has a blog by the same name, which can be found at LitwithLyns.com where she shares ideas and resources for middle school English/Language Arts. For more by Lyndsey, read: Does The Million Word Gap Exist? | 10 Tips For Giving A Memorable Final Presentation In The Digital Age

Get ready for the limelight with these tips on delivering a great presentations.

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• Graduate School

How to Write an Effective Statement of Intent

While most students have heard of a personal statement or statement of purpose, not many can accurately describe what a statement of intent is. This grad school admissions requirement is subtly different from the other “statement” essays you may be familiar with. It is most often requested as an application component for research intensive master’s programs. It typically centers around a cohesive narrative of the applicant’s research interests, experiences, long-term goals, and what they intend to study in grad school. You’ll need to tailor your essay to ensure you meet the unique requirements for this application component.

In this blog, our grad school essay tutors reveal what a statement of intent is, how it differs from a statement of purpose for graduate school , and how to write and structure your statement of intent. You can also check out a sample statement of intent for graduate school.

>> Want us to help you get accepted? Schedule a free strategy call here . <<

Article Contents 16 min read

What is a statement of intent.

A statement of intent, sometimes called statement of interest, is one of the many written essay-style components requested during the higher education admissions process to help admissions committees understand the applicant better. Specifically, a statement of intent is something you’ll need to write to get into grad school . Not all master’s programs ask for it. It is typically requested in addition to the statement of purpose or as an alternative to the statement of purpose. Research-intensive programs most often favor this type of statement. In this essay, they are looking for applicants to expand on their research skills, research experience, and specialized interests.

A statement of intent is, at its core, a functional document with an implicit argument. It serves a very specific purpose and has a singular theme: explaining how your research or career interests align with the features of the program you’re applying to.

It’s important to understand the difference between a statement of purpose and a statement of intent, especially if you need to submit both during a single application cycle. It’s easy to mix up these two essay components! They have a lot of overlap in terms of their content, presentation, and format. Both ask applicants to focus on their research interests, describe why they are interested in a specific field, expand on relevant past academic/professional experiences, and explain their long-term career goals. Admissions committees evaluate both of these statements to assess specific skills and qualities: communication skills, research skills, scientific literacy, problem solving, intellectual curiosity, teamwork, and leadership potential.

Despite these similarities, there are certain factors that differentiate a statement of intent and statement of purpose. The key difference is the scope. A statement of purpose is more general, focused on your overall suitability for the program. A statement of intent is more specific and detailed, focused on your intention to make use of actual features of the program. Statement of intent prompts often ask you to talk about which faculty members you want to work with, what program faculties you wish to use, etc.

The way you discuss your experiences is also different in each of these essays. In a statement of purpose, you can discuss your overall research vision, and connect your past experiences to your long-term career goals. While you can certainly do this in a statement of intent as well, you need to take it one step further. Programs actually expect you to use this essay to expand on the specific skills you gained through past research experiences and connect them with program details like curriculum, preferred departments or modules, faculty members, on-going projects, etc.

The statement of intent actually works as a base template for your research proposal. Many students opt to use their statement of intent to develop their research proposals later in their career. As it’s extremely detailed, some programs even opt to use it in lieu of an interview. On the other hand, some programs refer to your statement of intent as a kind of blueprint to structure your graduate school interview questions . You can expect questions that directly reference the ideas and experiences you’ve discussed in your statement of intent. That’s why it’s so important to be confident about and committed to the ideas you discuss in your statement of intent.

Are you working on your statement of purpose and looking for tips? Check this out:

The structure of your statement of intent is very important as it serves to build a coherent progression of experiences. In this type of essay, you need to provide specific, technical details related to your research interests and experiences, while also telling an engaging narrative that logically builds to the conclusion of you applying to grad school. The key to achieving this balance is creating an effective essay structure.

Start by creating an outline of your essay that is centered around your basic thesis or main point. Return to this thesis periodically to ensure you’re not straying from it as you structure your essay.

Add the following paragraphs:

Introduction:

The first paragraph should immediately grab the reader’s attention and set up a clear framework for the rest of the statement. Unlike, say, a medical school personal statement , or college essays , we don’t recommend starting with an “anchor” story or incident. Since this is a more functional document, including dramatic personal details or childhood memories would only end up clouding the key message of your statement. It’s better to go with a more straightforward introduction that succinctly sets up the main thesis. You can opt to make your introduction more engaging by adding a quote or referencing a specific book or mentor who inspired you; having said that, make sure any external references are always relevant to your actual research interest and further your central argument. Critically, make sure you don’t forget to introduce your research topic, the name of the school you’re applying to, as well as the name of the specific program/department in the very first paragraph.

Body Paragraph 1/2/3/4/5

Next, you can add 1 to 5 main body paragraphs (depending on your word count) where you build a foundation of your research work, interests, experiences, and goals. Each paragraph should be clear, concise and informative. There are certain critical content targets you should keep in mind as you write these paragraphs:

Address the prompt and talk about the specific aspects of the program you\u2019re interested in, such as faculty members you\u2019d love to work with. "}]">

Your conclusion should include a concise statement of your key qualifications and unique suitability for the program. Touch upon how you’ll make use of your time at this school, and how that will help you in your long-term career goals. Reiterate your interest in their specific program.

The word count for a statement of intent can vary from school to school, but it generally ranges between 250 to 1000 words. You should tailor your statement as per your specific word count requirements.

Top Tips for Writing Your Statement of Intent

Keep these tips in mind to write an outstanding statement of intent that effectively communicates your research strengths.

Develop your central research thesis

If you’re applying to grad school, then you probably already have some idea about the kind of research you want to specialize in. If you’re having trouble formulating this idea or condensing it down for your statement of intent, try using the following strategy to structure your thinking and organize your thoughts in a more logical flow. Break down your research interest into three levels, as follows:

Are you solving any specific problem or addressing an existing issue via this research? ","label":"Problem","title":"Problem"}]" code="tab1" template="BlogArticle">

As we mentioned above, your statement of intent needs to be very specific and must reference the programs you’re applying to. Some schools even provide a specific prompt asking you to talk about which faculty members you want to work with, what sub-department you want to study under, and so on. Make sure you do the required research about what the school and the program have to offer so you can accurately reference this information in your statement. To begin with, you should check the program websites. If they don’t provide enough information, we recommend you reach out to alumni, professors, and current students to learn more.

Find out about the credentials of faculty members, their previous published work, their on-going projects, etc. Check the range of facilities that the school is offering, such as equipment, labs, and academic resources, as well as unique research or clinical experience opportunities. Don’t neglect the extracurriculars such as student support groups, prestigious clubs, and other opportunities that you won’t get on any other campus.

While you’re doing this research, make notes about how your own strengths connect to the unique features of the program. Do you have skills that could be particularly useful for an on-going research project? Do you have past research experience in the same topics that a faculty member is an expert in? When you’re actually writing the statement, these notes will help you to explain not only what you have to offer to the program, but also how you can use this program to further your long-term professional or academic goals.

Looking for a summary of our top tips for writing an effective statement of intent? Check out this infographic:

Follow the guidelines

As you begin your writing, ensure that you review all the guidelines that the school has provided and are closely adhering to then. For example, if there’s a prompt, go through it a few times, and make sure you are responding to the spirit as well as the letter of the prompt. Other considerations you should keep in mind include the maximum and minimum word count, the specific format, and “recommended” stylistic guidelines. For example, some schools ask you to write a formal statement that includes academic citations of works to support each of your research arguments along with references to works that have inspired you. You’ll have to customize the presentation, format, and content of each statement of intent to meet these kinds of specific requirements.

Tell a story with your experiences

It’s very important to remember that your statement of intent, though it is a more technical and functional essay, should not be merely a dry summary of facts, similar to a CV for grad school . Instead, you should write a logical and engaging narrative of the achievements and experiences that led you to your research goals, and how they connect to the program you’re applying to. Add details of your skills and commendable qualities backed up by actual experiences that demonstrate your passion and enthusiasm for the subject. Admissions committees are always more impressed by “proof” of abilities i.e., they want applicants to show them their journey, not merely tell them about it. For example, instead of merely saying that you have an extensive knowledge of bio-chemical reactions in banana enzymes, identify the specific research experience where you honed this knowledge, and explain the circumstances in your essay. If it was a research project, then provide details about the project name and supervisor, as well as your own role in the project and the daily tasks you performed.

Check out this video for tips on writing your CV for Grad School:

Don’t clutter your statement of intent with too many experiences and achievements. Always keep referencing your central thesis and evaluating if a specific experience will add to your overall narrative or not. After you’ve worked out your central thesis, spend some time analyzing all your academic, research, volunteer, extracurricular, employment, and life experiences. Select 2 to 5 of the most suitable experiences that align with both your research interests and the program admissions criteria and add only those. If you have numerous such experiences to choose from, we suggest prioritizing current or recent experiences.

As you’re discussing each experience or achievement, be specific and detailed, and provide all the relevant information including the names of supervisors, a detailed list of your duties, and so on. You can also make your statement of intent more robust by referring to a wide variety of sources as your research “inspiration”, including classes, academic conversations, workshops, lectures, seminars, books, as well as the more typical experiences of volunteering, work, or research.

A useful tip: make sure you’re adding transitory statements at the end and beginning of each paragraph, to build that logical flow and connect one experience or idea to the next. If you think your essay is looking too dry or CV-like, this is one quick fix you can try in order to narrativize your experiences.

Since a statement of intent is a more formal document written for a very specific purpose, ensure you are using professional/academic and formal language and, if required, you can use technical terms to explain your research ideas. Your evaluators will most likely be professionals from the same field, and they actually expect you to show your expertise in that specific area.

At the same time, avoid using long, complicated sentences. Make sure you use your authentic voice and keep your tone as natural as possible. Thoroughly check your essays for grammar, spelling, clarity of thought, logical flow, and coherence.

Remember that your statement of intent is very different from a personal statement. As we mentioned previously, it’s more formal and has a very specific focus. The admissions committee is expecting to see a coherent autobiography of your academic or professional interests and experiences. That should be your focus – you should only refer to personal information as it relates to the larger context of your academic experiences. For example, avoid telling stories from your childhood about your early interests or including details about life events that shaped you, unless they are strictly relevant to your research journey.

This isn’t the right platform to expand upon excessively personal issues such as an illness or major life changes. You can briefly touch upon these topics or weave them into your professional narrative, if it makes sense. For example, if your grades took a serious dip in a specific period due to personal circumstances, you could choose to briefly address that. But don’t make such incidents the central thesis of your statement of intent. Focus on skills, abilities and contributions, and your inspiration and motivation to pursue research. Rather than expanding on irrelevant childhood details, expand on your professional, academic, and personal connections to the program and school you’re applying to.

Avoid cliches and focus on facts

You don’t need a high-level research “break-through” or nationally recognized academic or research award to make your statement of intent stand out. Many students turn to cliches such as “I want to make the world a better place” or “I just want to help people” to hide what they perceive as insufficiently impressive experiences. In fact, no matter what your past experiences, it’s much better to focus on covering the facts, rather than evoking sentimental cliches to make your experiences seem grander than they actually are. Admissions committees aren’t expecting you to have advanced achievements beyond your level – the whole point of applying to grad school is to get the opportunity to do that level of work.

So instead of worrying about the “quality” of your experiences, focus on ensuring that your essay effectively discussed your best skills and true capabilities. Spend some time self-reflecting about what you learned from your academic, professional, and extracurricular experiences, how they contributed to your journey to grad school, what new skills you developed, what obstacles you overcame, and so on.

Write multiple drafts and seek feedback from experts

A statement of intent requires a little more intensive writing and editing than your typical admissions essays and statements. We suggest sharing your essay with subject matter experts such as research supervisors, faculty members, and other academic mentors who can give you their detailed feedback about the technical aspects of your statement. Their suggestions can help you refine your essay and identify ways to differentiate your thesis from others.

If you’re sure about the technical content of your essay, but need help with the writing, flow, coherence, grammar, and other such stylistic elements, consider getting expert help from a graduate school admissions consultant . These consultants have worked with numerous other students and can help you improve your written communication skills with proven strategies that work.

Whether or not you engage the help of experts, make sure you ask at least 1 other person to review your statement of intent once, even if they’re just a friend or family member. Remember, after going over the same content over and over again for days and weeks, visual fatigue sets in. A fresh pair of eyes can spot small errors and mistakes that you might have missed.

Sample Statement of Intent

Here’s a sample statement of intent for your reference:

Program/School : Clinical Psychology Masters at Ryerson University

Prompt : Describe your reasons for pursuing graduate study in the Psychology program, your research interests, how your previous studies and experiences have prepared you for the program, as well as your career objectives and how the graduate degree will advance them. (500-1000 words)

Statement of Intent:

“What is the ticking mechanism of the human mind? How can we truly know it?”

Professor Donaldson’s words from my very first Intro to Psychology class sparked my interest in the world of clinical psychology. Following my curiosity rewarded me with the discovery of my central academic passion in life – developmental psychology and its applications for adolescent females. Today, I hope to enroll in Ryerson University’s Clinical Psychology program so I can further explore my research interests and channel them towards my long-term goals of becoming a research-psychologist, combining clinical psychology practice with research experience to make new discoveries in this area. I believe my undergraduate education has prepared me to undertake advanced research projects and I would be an excellent candidate for your program.

My initial interest in psychology at the beginning of my freshman year soon led me to take on advanced psychology coursework, targeted personal reading, and extra credit projects. I soon built up a strong foundational base in the concepts of General Psychology, Behavioral Psychology, Social Psychology, Cognitive Psychology, Abnormal Psychology, and Psychology of Gender Roles. When completing the last course during my sophomore year, I found that I had a strong academic interest in the intersections of gender theory and clinical psychology. I was simultaneously completing a Psychological Assessment Tools course to hone my clinical lab skills. The confluence of these two courses helped me synthesize my special interest in understanding and addressing the biases in classic psychological assessment tools and analyzing their impact on incorrect diagnosis, failed treatments, and rate of relapse in impacted patients, especially women. That was when I decided that I wanted to improve my research skills so I could eventually complete advanced studies in this area.

A statement of intent is an autobiographical summary of your research interests and experiences, with an emphasis on how the program you’re applying to can help you achieve your goals. Some schools provide specific prompts for their statement of intent, asking students to describe aspects of their program they would most benefit from. A statement of intent is a more formal and functional document than your typical admissions essays, and usually only research-intensive master’s courses request this type of essay in your application.

While these two admissions essays have a lot in common – for example, they are both research-focused and help admissions committees evaluate your academic and professional credentials for their program. However, a key difference between them is the scope. A statement of purpose is more general, focused on your overall academic, professional and/or extracurricular experiences and your long-term career goals. A statement of intent is more targeted and detailed, with a clear focus on your specific research interests. In your statement of intent, you must reference the programs you’re applying to, and explain at length how you can contribute to them and which of their offerings most attract you.

This depends on the specific requirements of the program you’re applying to. Generally, a statement of intent has a prescribed word count ranging from 250 to 1000 words. Even if there’s no maximum word count provided, we recommend not exceeding 900 words. While you need to explain your research interests in detail, remember that this essay is not a research thesis and doesn’t need that level of scientific enquiry.

Your statement of intent should have the following structure:

• Introduction : This should clearly set out your central thesis and reference your research interests and the name of the program/school you’re applying to.
• Main body paragraphs : You can add 1 to 5 body paragraphs to discuss the details of relevant experiences and achievements, key skills and qualities, and your specific interest in the program you’re applying to.
• Conclusion : Here, make sure you reiterate your research thesis, and call back to the program/college name. Provide a clear statement of why you think you are a uniquely well-suited candidate for their program.

To write an impressive statement of intent, you’ll have to spend sufficient time researching the facilities and features of the program and school you’re applying to, analyzing your own research interests and skills, and coming up with a central “thesis” that aligns the two. Include details of multiple experiences, achievements, awards, and activities to support your claims and prove your passion and suitability for a specific research area. Avoid including irrelevant personal details or cliches, and instead focus on creating a logical flow of experiences leading to your current application.

No, your statement of intent must be tailored for each program you’re applying to. That’s the whole point of a statement of intent – it explains why you’re well-suited to a particular program, and how you intend to use their resources to further your research interests. If you don’t refer to their unique offerings and instead just provide a general summary of your research interests, admissions committees will not be able to gauge why you’re a good fit for their program.

No, not all graduate programs ask for a statement of intent. Some ask for an additional statement of intent along with a personal statement and/or statement of purpose, while others only require the statement of intent. You should check the admissions websites of the schools you’re applying to learn more.

We recommend that you spend at least 6 weeks writing your statement of intent. This will give you sufficient time to refine your central “research thesis”, analyze your history of experiences to identify the most suitable ones, write and edit multiple drafts, and seek out feedback from expert reviewers.

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ITABANA, BLESSING EFFIONG

Absolutely loved reading this. Great job!!!

BeMo Academic Consulting

Hello and thank you very much for your comment! So glad you enjoyed this article!

Do you have any research statement of intent for Master's in Physics?

Hello Saba! Thanks for your comment. We will try to include one when we update the blog :)

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Retraction Watch

Tracking retractions as a window into the scientific process

MDPI backtracks on claim that a thesis can’t be plagiarized

The publisher MDPI has reversed itself on one reason it said a paper does not need to be retracted following allegations the authors had plagiarized a thesis.

As we reported earlier this week , the editorial office at Nutrients told Solange Saxby, a postdoctoral research fellow at Dartmouth Health in Lebanon, NH, in May that it didn’t consider apparent overlap between a 2023 paper and her 2020 thesis plagiarism “because thesis materials are not classified as prior publications.”

Yesterday, MDPI did a 180, blaming a “mismatch in their internal communications” for the responses Saxby received.

“As a publisher, we do not support the statement that ‘the behavior did not amount to plagiarism because the prior work was a thesis,’” Rui Duarte, the public relations manager for  the company, said. “While we strive to maintain high standards of service and clear communication, occasional errors can occur.”

The corresponding author of the Nutrients paper has called the failure to cite Saxby’s thesis “an oversight” and said she has been working with the publisher to correct the error.

Following the publication of our story, the Nutrients editorial office told Retraction Watch that the investigation into this case was now closed, concluding “there was no plagiarism or any significant overlap.” The office said that a technical analysis and detailed comparison between the two manuscripts found less than 1% overlap.

Duarte reiterated the investigation was closed. He said the editorial board determined that the “similarities with Dr. Saxby’s thesis consist of well-established statements that exist within the wider body of the literature related to the Taro root and are cited as such.”

Here is a comparison of some passages of the Nutrients paper with Saxby’s dissertation. 

Saxby dissertation, page 15:

Taro contains a unique composition of protein polypeptides that have not been found in other root crops, and exclusively found in tubers from C. esculenta .

Section 3.3 of the Nutrients paper:

Taro contains a unique protein polypeptide composition that has not been found in other root crops and is exclusively found in tubers from C. esculenta .

Same paragraph, Saxby dissertation:

Furthermore, taro differs from sweet potato, cassava and yams, in that it contains two major types of storage protein: G1 (a mannosebinding lectin) and G2 (a trypsin inhibitor related to sporamin). Thus, the low protein content and gluten-free composition of taro makes for great hypoallergenic food and potential food substitutes for individuals with food allergies. 

Same paragraph, Nutrients paper: 

Furthermore, in terms of protein content, taro differs from other root crops as it contains two important types of protein: G1 (a mannose-binding lectin) and G2 (a trypsin inhibitor) [43]. Therefore, taro constitutes an excellent hypoallergenic food and a possible substitute for people with food allergies because of its low protein content and gluten-free composition.

MDPI said a correction to acknowledge Saxby’s work is “necessary” and “under preparation.”

Saxby declined to comment further.

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20 thoughts on “mdpi backtracks on claim that a thesis can’t be plagiarized”.

Bad sign when editorial ethics have to be determined by your PR manager.

Yes, I spoke to MDPI editorial service for 4 years.

They are just terrible and the staff changes everything 6 months : “thank you for your patience” is the only thing they say, hoping that you’ll give up ( which I finally did ….)

They never handle a problem until it’s public

At the very least I hope the correction will be completely thorough and give due credit to Saxby’s thesis for each discrete instance in which overlap occurred (i.e., paragraph and line numbers). But, I won’t be holding my breath.

This really has to be field specific. In CS it’s common for a student’s thesis to be a bunch of their papers stapled together with an introduction that puts them all in context. Someone could easily have their thesis also include some unpublished content, and then they turn around and extend that content to a full paper which they submit for publication. Yes they should cite their thesis, but honestly I’d just recommend that for the historical record.

But in this case the author of the thesis was not the author of the paper where the plagiarism occured; this was not self-plagiarism.

Yeah I misunderstood and that completely changes the situation. Kind of wild that MDPI’s stance would ever have been “nah if it’s only in a thesis it’s fair game for you to take.”

Word for word copying of published works without citation is plagiarism, is it not? If the new and original parts of the paper are not the result of plagiarism, then I would be OK with an amended version with citations and revision history.

The paper should be retracted until the new version is published. There could also be a problem with incorrect citations in other papers, citing the problematic paper instead of the original.

Sorry, I misunderstood the situation. I thought the author of the paper under review for retraction was the same as the author of the thesis.

There is a very simple solution to this problem. Universities either allow or disallow “compilation style” thesis. Some students without academic aspirations might prefer the compilation route, while other might prefer the monograph route.

Anyway… it has nothing to do with the case at hand.

Your last sentence hit the nail on the head. I was ranting about something that was irrelevant because I misunderstood the situation.

In your defense, I must say that I also misunderstood the situation. The introduction of this article does not make it sufficiently clear that this was not a case of self plagiarism as the author’s of the paper are not mentioned. I was always of the opinion that is fine and common to use parts of one’s own thesis as long as it is properly cited. Ideally, one would also bring up this potential issue with the editor to make sure they are ok with it.

But, since this is a case of straight up plagiarism these finer points don’t apply and I completely agree that the journal should have immediately pulled the paper and blacklisted the authors.

This kind of error must not go unpunished. Now that the story has some traction, they are doing a 180. They thought they could bully their way through it. Heavy fines must be levied for such behaviour and the author must be compensated for this harrassment.

“This kind of error must not go unpunished.”

The solution is simple: Don’t write, review, or edit for MDPI journals. And don’t read the stuff that they publish. It’s hard to say wich papers to trust, given the type of “quality control” they are exercising.

This is the correct answer.

Hi, I am not well versed with academic cheating. In the above case, what if the authors for both works is one and the same person? Can he be accused and “convicted” of plagiarising (his own work)?

I like citations about plagiarism from the commentaries. How do I quote them on my plagiarism paper?

Excuse me, but as I read the story, Saxby wrote both the article and the thesis. It’s all her work, she didn’t steal anything from anyone. She didn’t claim anyone else’s work as her own. How is that plagiarism?

Read the previous piece – Saxby was not an author on the Nutrients article: https://retractionwatch.com/2024/06/03/a-disturbing-experience-postdoc-fights-to-have-work-that-plagiarized-her-thesis-retracted/

Because several readers were confused, I suggest editing this post to explicitly state that Saxby was not an author on the paper.

I was also confused by the wording of the article, it does seem that they are the same author based on how it is described. And edit would be helpful to make it clearer that this is not a case of self-plagairism.

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